The top 6 Star Wars creatures ranked by how good they probably taste

Much of the enduring popularity of the Star Wars universe is thanks to its loveable cast of critters and the fun of imagining what they might taste like if you cooked and ate one. Here are the top 6 Star Wars creatures ranked in order of their presumed deliciousness:   

6. BOTHANS

Full disclosure: these Bothwaian anthropoids taste horrible. But they're great for setting up a "Many Bothans died to bring us these sandwiches" joke.

5. TAUNTAUNS

They may not be the cutest critters in the Empire, but these furry beasts probably taste great roasted with a side of Corillean charbote root. The layers of fatty blubber they adapted for the freezing climate of Hoth would likely lead to well-marbled cuts packed with natural flavour. That said, the active lifestyle Tauntauns require to evade Wampas means the meat will be tougher, so be sure to cook to well-done before eating.     

4. EWOKS

These fuzzy forest-dwellers are more than just adorable guerrilla warriors, they're also a tasty source of protein! While their meat is likely on a gamier side, lean Ewok can be outstanding when paired with the right marinade. Choose one with a diet high in cambylictus berry for a flavour that will have you singing "Yub Nub" in celebration.     

While some may hesitate to eat sentient creatures that have their own culture and social structure, remember that the Ewoks didn't think twice before trying to eat Luke and Han. Fair game is fair game. Now pass over some more of that medium-rare Wicket!

3. PORGS

Perhaps the most versatile of the Star Wars meats, these mouth-watering Ahch-To seabirds can presumably be prepared any number of ways. Whether you're braising, stewing, or spit-roasting over an open flame, the dark meat of a Porg will be the hit of any neighbourhood barbeque. While they may taste great melting off the bone, be careful not to look into their adorable eyes or they might just melt your heart. Until then, make mine extra crispy!     

2. WOOKIEES

Thanks to their size and active lifestyle, most Wookiees are on the chewy side (LOL). Cooked on its own, their sinewy musculature might not stand out. But if slow-roasted to a fine char, Grade A Wookiee meat has a texture unparalleled in the galaxy. Pair yours with a tall glass of Blue Milk.      

1. WHATEVER SPECIES YODA IS

In all likelihood, Yoda tastes like an exact blend of salt water taffy and beef jerky. Yoda-licious!

Bon appetit! And may the flavour be with you! 

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