'Letting kids just be kids': Meet the people behind London's only LGBTQ+ group for children

It started out as a need to find a support system for children who were LGBTQ+ and questioning for Megan Morris and Christa Duvall. 

When they couldn't find any support services specifically for children who were exploring their identities, they decided to start their own social group for children under the age of 14 called "Try-U", also known as "The Rainbow Youth Umbrella".

Morris, an elementary school teacher, had seen so many children come out to her privately over the years, and had struggled to find support groups for her young students. 

She wanted to give kids the resources they needed.

Duvall, active member and volunteer within the LGBTQ+ community, also had many parents reaching out to ask if there were any support groups specifically for younger kids.  

Both women began researching, but the results were disheartening. 

"There was nothing," said Morris.

She had tried looking in Toronto for similar support services targeted toward LGBTQ+ children, hoping to see if something could be replicated in London. The only group that she was able to find in Toronto was no longer operating. 

When we started, we didn't have high hopes ... if three kids showed up, we'd be happy.- Christa Duvall, Try-U Facilitator

Duvall had similar luck. When she mentioned to someone her struggles, they passed along Morris' contact information.

She reached out and the two connected. They decided to start Try-U, a social group for young kids in a space where they could feel comfortable. 

In March 2018, they launched their first ever meeting. Being so new, they didn't expect a big reception.

"When we started, we didn't have high hopes," said Duvall, "If three kids showed up, we'd be happy."

Little did they know how overwhelming the turnout would be.

"On the first night, we had 15 kids," said Duvall. 

The positive reception made it clear to both women how vital it was to have a group for LGBTQ+ children. 

Meeting on the first Thursday of every month at Innovation Works from 6 to 8 p.m., Morris and Duvall facilitate an inclusive and welcoming atmosphere for LGBTQ+ and questioning kids to hang out in a safe environment.

Most of the children who attend are between the ages of seven and 14. 

While they often have between 10 to 15 kids show up to each meeting, sometimes as many as 30 have come. 

"London had a need for [LGBTQ+] kids 14 and under to socialize," said Duvall.

Other groups for LGBTQ+ youth around the city are open to children as young as 15. While some kids leave Try-U to go to these other support groups, Duvall says they've made exceptions for kids who wanted to stay with their friends. 

Before each meeting, Morris and Duvall reach out to participants to ask if there's anything specific they want to do. Sometimes they'll plan a movie night with popcorn and snacks. Other times they'll do crafts, game nights or painting. 

Sometimes all the kids want to do is just sit down and talk. 

"Whatever we can do to support, we [do] have," said Duvall. 

Both Duvall and Morris agree that this is a place for the kids to be able to express themselves freely. They say that the differences they've seen in the children has been incredible. 

Duvall describes times in which children have come in happily sharing they started hormone blockers, and the other kids cheering as they joined in on the celebrations. 

One large support network

But the kids aren't the only ones finding a supportive environment.

Duvall says that many parents of attendees have also found support in each other. 

"We focus on how hard it is for the kids to come out, but it's not just the child, it's also the family too," she said. "Parents have to come out to their families, friends and communities."

The uncanny thing is how organically it happened- Christa Duvall, Try-U Facilitator

At that first meeting, Duvall says that while all the kids sat around one table, there were six moms crammed into a corner together.

It was the beginning of the parents' own little support group that continued throughout the Try-U nights. As the meetings went on, the kids socialize in one room so they could feel comfortable talking without their parents around.

Meanwhile the parents began chatting among themselves in an adjoining room. 

Sometimes they have coffee together, do work, or spend their time talking. It's become a safe space for the parents to share their own experiences and find strength with each other as they navigate new challenges with their children. 

"The uncanny thing is how organically it happened," said Duvall. 

While it's been a rewarding experience to watch their participants flourish, Duvall notes it can be difficult sometimes seeing the pain some children are going through. 

Some are struggling with their identities at school, or have families that don't support them.

"Sometimes it's so hard," said Duvall, "You just want to hug them and tell them 'Everything's going to be okay' and that it gets better." 

But finding their own little community at Try-U has helped bring together a new community of adults and youth who are embracing themselves, supporting each other and finding the confidence to be themselves in a caring environment. 

"At the end of the day, it's what really matters," said Morris. "Letting kids just be kids."