Local siblings try to talk on the phone, good effort everyone

"Hey, happy happy May," said Heather Bowing, 26, to her brother James Bowing, 28.

"Yeah, happy May?"  

This year, the semi-annual Sibling Phone Call would fall on May 26th, after being postponed for a week and a half for no reason at all.

"Even though we've grown up, my brother and I still have a lot in common. He would tell you the same thing," said Heather, looking at a photo of herself as a child.

"Not really," said her brother, responding to the same question.

Beyond tagging each other in one-minute microwavable mac and cheese recipes and the occasional "This is so you" comment on an Instagram post that has nothing to do with anything, it had been months since the siblings had communicated.

Last time they talked, they burned through all of their shared memories: having parents, growing up, being siblings. That was all of it, meaning this call would have to venture into the present — something both siblings couldn't really care less about.

"How is soccer going?"

"Hockey."

"That's what I meant."

"I quit two months ago when I broke my leg."

"I remember!"

Heather admitted she couldn't remember a single thing about her brother after his eighth birthday party when he cried about a grasshopper stuck in the pants of his overalls.

"Are you still scared of grasshoppers?"

"No. Uh, how's work going?"

"I lost my job, remember?"

"Mhmm."

At this point the phone call had been an incredible 56 seconds long and the pair had already caught up on current jobs, relationships, housing, sleep patterns, the weather, grasshoppers and the weather again. They really are trying, and they really "love the sun."

"I love my brother," Heather assures us, "so talking to him is...easy. It's really easy."

"Do you believe in reindeer?"

"Heather seems to think I haven't grown up at all," said James who is currently filing for a divorce. "Don't tell her about the divorce, because I forgot to invite her to the wedding."

"Want to play Tic Tac Toe?"

"We're on the phone, but...top centre."

"This is fun."

Coming up on three minutes, both siblings have accomplished something they should be proud of. Not only have they talked without their parents telling them to, but they've done it while completely denying how difficult it has been.

"It's been so nice talking to you."

"Yeah, great to catch up on everything with you."

"What do you want for Christmas?"

"It's May, we'll talk before then."

"Right."

Before hanging up they made plans to phone once a week on Friday nights — a reasonable arrangement considering neither of them will ever do that. The phone call will fit nicely in their schedules right between keeping in touch with friends from middle school and cleaning the goddamn fridge.

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