Family first, then politics: How a Republican and a Democrat keep the peace in a nation divided
In North Carolina, she's a Trump backer and election denier; he's a lifelong Democrat
It's clear whose political camp Tracey Danka is in as you pull up to her tree-lined property in Calabash, N.C. Various flags promoting Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump flap in the breeze.
But there's also a giant banner for Democratic candidate Kamala Harris and running mate Tim Walz prominently lashed between two trees.
"Well, let me tell you the only reason there is Harris is because I ordered it for my husband," Danka said.
Danka, who still believes the 2020 presidential election was stolen from Trump by U.S. President Joe Biden, is married to a lifelong Democrat who does not. Raised in Pennsylvania by parents who were Democrats, Danka is a mother of two recent college graduates, an organ donation advocate — and she once voted for Barack Obama.
But that was before Trump took a ride down that golden escalator in Trump Tower to announce his 2016 candidacy for U.S. president.
"I remember thinking that as sad as it is, our country is a business and we needed a businessman running our country rather than a politician, because these politicians would say and do whatever they needed to talk to the person in front of them," she said.
Trump, hot off his television show The Apprentice, was known for firing people who fell short of expectations, and Danka liked that. But, she said, "Do I agree with everything Donald Trump says? No."
For one, she doesn't believe in tax breaks for the wealthy, she believes in exceptions for abortion in cases of rape and incest — and the kidney recipient acknowledges that the Affordable Care Act, brought in under Obama, may have saved her family from financial ruin.
"If it wasn't for Obamacare, we would have lost everything and we would probably be renting some rat hole," she said.
But Danka is aligned with Trumpism on many other fronts.
"I want the illegal immigrants gone. I want our veterans taken care of. I want our children to be able to be children. I want the schools to not be able to take away the parents' rights. I want a [border] wall. I don't care who pays for it," she said.
Jan. 6 protester mistrusts journalists
Danka also continues to believe the myriad disproven claims of election fraud in the 2020 election, which is what brought her to the U.S. Capitol building in Washington, D.C., on Jan. 6, 2021.
"Our voices didn't matter. It didn't matter how we voted," she said.
- This Sunday, Cross Country Checkup is asking: What's at stake for you in the US election? Fill out this form and you could appear on the show or have your comment read on air.
Danka said she went to support Trump, but while she marched to the Capitol — where a vote was being held to certify the 2020 election results and a huge throng of protesters had gathered — she didn't go inside the building.
"Why? Because it wasn't right. You know ... God gave us free will. How we choose to use it is really up to us," she said.
Like many in Trump's Make America Great Again movement, she has a deep mistrust of journalists.
"Turn on the TV. Are you kidding me? You know, I mean, look at the news. It's always 'and Trump has done this and Trump has done that. The Republicans have done this.'"
On Jan. 6, Danka was part of a crowd that mobbed me a few blocks from the U.S. Capitol. To Danka, on that day, I was a symbol of Donald Trump's "fake news."
I show her the video from Jan. 6. It's an uncomfortable moment. She shifts her weight and shakes her head and grimaces as it plays out on an iPad.
"It was just rude and uncalled for," Danka said. "Nobody should attack anyone for doing their job for, you know, speaking their mind for reporting the news. So yeah, I would say I was wrong.
"As a person who is a proud Republican and a Christian, how dare I?" she said. "I'm so sorry."
Seven months after that day in Washington, Danka sat down with a local news reporter to talk about the importance of kidney donations.
And, of course, she recently invited a CBC News reporter into her home, which is an act of trust. I wanted to know what changed.
"I guess it's who the journalist is," Danka said. "I guess it's what their goal was and what they've said in the past and how they've portrayed people. So do I agree with all of them? Nope. Do I trust them all? Nope."
'I foresee martial law'
Once a week, Danka cooks food for seniors. She drives to neighbouring South Carolina, where it's clear Donald Trump's big lie has an unshakable hold on many in these parts.
Her first stop is to drop off the spinach ravioli to Joe Naudus Sr., a retired Vietnam War veteran, and his Yorkie. Naudus's mistrust of the 2020 election results has spilled over to the election on Nov. 5, and he fears there will be violence.
"I don't like to think about it. But if this election goes bad on the far left, there's going to be a civil war," he said.
Naudus is so suspicious of the election process, he thinks that even if Donald Trump wins, he won't be allowed into the Oval Office.
"I have my doubts whether they're going to let President Trump into the White House if he does get elected. I foresee martial law," he said.
Down the road, Danka drops a care package off to Francine Lazard-Ailing, who originally hailed from Canada and used to vote Liberal but is now a U.S. citizen and a Trump supporter.
"In my opinion, it was a stolen election," she said, adding she's worried about the integrity of this election. "I hope that they will have enough people standing up and watching on both sides."
Many in Danka's circle still share the same set of beliefs that the 2020 election was stolen from Trump, but her husband of 26 years, Ed Danka is not one of them. There is a factual gulf between the Democrat and his MAGA-minded wife, including around what happened on Jan. 6.
"We seem to have two very different versions. I was watching that on TV from the get-go. And what I saw when I talk with Tracey is not what she relates that she saw," he said. "I know what I saw. I saw people breaking into the Capitol building attacking officers."
Seated next to her husband on their back patio, Tracey Danka paints a different picture.
"For me, it was a show of support. Patriotism. Love," she said.
Deep fears about November election
The two spar over Trump's assertions that the last election was stolen, the withdrawal of U.S. troops from Afghanistan and Kamala Harris. Even so, they hold hands.
"The last thing on Earth we would ever allow is four people that we do not know personally to affect our marriage. We were married in a church under the eyes of God. And that's where our marriage is focused" Tracey said.
"Family comes first and then politics," Ed agreed. "All we can do is vote for who we think needs to be in that job and hope for the best, and may the better man or woman win."
Still the two live in different information ecosystems.
Ed watches a lot of different news channels and researches current events online. Tracey doesn't watch live TV and is mistrustful of most American news outlets, but she spends a lot of time sharing information on Facebook.
"It's frustrating," Ed said, especially when it comes to the allegations of election fraud.
"They went to 60 different lawsuits in different states claiming, you know, that the election was rigged, and every one of them, they lost," he said.
"So what do you need to do with these people for them to get it?" he said. "It's almost like a cult. I mean, when you have a cult, no matter what that cult leader says, the members go along with it. They're mesmerized."
One thing the Dankas both agree on is that the violence at the Capitol was wrong, and they harbour deep fears about what could happen in November.
"I feel if Trump does not get elected, it's going to be worse than it was the previous Jan. 6," Ed said. "He's had four years to plan it."
Asked whether she plans to heed Trump's call if there's another protest akin to Jan. 6 after this election, Tracey said, "I'm going to say no only because, you know, my husband will back me 110 per cent in anything I do," she trailed off.
"But not when there's danger out there, honey," Ed finished the thought. "Because now you know it's there. You didn't know it before four years ago. But now you know what they're capable of."
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
