Talking Animals: Dealing with grief after a pet dies
'People talk about it as though it is the loss of a child'
What happens when a pet dies? Anthrozoologist professor Beth Daley joined Tony Doucette on Windsor Morning for her latest edition of 'Talking Animals' to explore the grief after the loss of a pet.
How does the grief over losing a pet compare to losing a human member of the family?
It's so different. I've talked to many people about this issue and there are a number of factors. It often matters what kind of pet, whose pet it is and how attached the person was. It can be very devastating to a child who is 12 or 13 to lose a 15-year-old dog or cat.
I've talked to a number of people who have lost an older animal and who have lost older parents and they say it's not logical but the actual feelings of trauma were actually worse for the animal. I think it has something to do with feeling like they failed, or you've lost something you took care of. Anyone who has children will say it's not even comparable, but people who don't have kids will say they feel like they've lost a child.
Often when animals die, it's because we've taken them to the vet to have them euthanized. Does that make the grief worse?
It depends on the state of the animal. For many people the decision to [euthanize] is very difficult.
Before taking that step, how far will people go to save their pets? How much will they spend?
For instance, if a dog gets hit by a car ... you cannot take that animal to the vet and have surgery until you've paid upfront. Many people these days live paycheck to paycheck. You have to trust your veterinarian, trust that you're doing the right thing. At some point when it gets to be $10- or $15,000 you have to ask yourself, 'Is this going to impact my life?' Nobody else can decide if it's worth it.
Questions and answers have been edited for length and clarity.
Listen to the full interview on Windsor Morning: