High-priced millennial weddings cause guests to seek out financial planner

Millennial brides and grooms ask a lot of their bridal parties. For some, the expectations can threaten to break the bank.

There's the dress or suit, the shoes, hair and makeup, a bachelor or bachelorette party, a wedding shower, or even destination celebrations before the actual wedding.

Prince Albert woman Cory Crosland said she was a university student when she was asked to be in three different weddings. That meant dropping cash on dresses, alterations, hair and makeup, and organizing a stagette.

"I wasn't really making much money," she said.

But she had a job to do. Each bridesmaid dress she purchased for her friends' weddings cost between $120 to $350.

"Some friends want us to put the same colour shoe and the height to match."

Expect a $500 to $1K commitment

Canadian couples spend on average $30,000 on their big day, according to Saskatoon financial planner Caval Olson-Lepage.

With the increase in couple spending comes higher expectations of the people who love them, with Olson-Lepage estimating members of the bridal party can pay to the tune of $500 to $1,000.

"When I got married, my stagette was just at a local park and you just went and had a few drinks," she said.

"It cost you some drinks and your cab ride home."

Fast forward a decade and couples are often taking trips to Las Vegas with their parties, she said.

"That can run anyone up to $12,000 a person, plus typically the bride or groom doesn't pay for their own trip," said Olson-Lepage.

Destination expectations

When Olson-Lepage started her career in the financial industry, wedding culture was different. Now, she said people are coming to her asking how they can save for their friends' wedding.

A typical engagement is 18 to 24 months. While that seems like a lot of time to get the cash together, most people need strategies to do it, she said.

Expectations are different for each wedding, but destination weddings can come at a greater price.

Bridal parties and all other guests are typically expected to buy their own plane tickets and pay for their accommodations. The cost can creep up on people who just want to support their friend or family member, said Olson-Lepage. 

She suggests putting away $100 each month into a savings account to save for a trip that could cost about $1,500.

Some don't have that much left over at the end of the month, so she suggests breaking down spending.

"How much do you spend on coffee per day if you're a Starbucks lover?" she said.

"If you can spend $150 a month on coffee and this wedding's really important to you, you might want to divert some of that cash."

How to say no

Some wedding guests are willing and able to go along with the demands of the couple, but Olson-Lepage said for others, it's just not possible. 

If the wedding is between two people you don't feel particularly close to, and there are 10 people in the bridal party, saying no may be easier, she said, advising people just to be honest.

"Don't be outright rude," she said.

"Say, 'You know, I really value you as a friend and I'm grateful you asked me.'"

She recommended that people can follow up with an honest conversation about the expenses, and express their desire to be included as a guest, rather than a member of the bridal party.