What it means to be a neighbour in Saskatchewan

The COVID-19 pandemic is one of many things altering the way people feel about their neighbours.

The Neighbourhood Project is a new CBC Saskatchewan series looking at the good, bad and ever-evolving relationships in this province's neighbourhoods.

A neighbour can be someone you know by name, someone you consider a best friend, or someone you've never even met. A neighbour can be someone next door, across the hall, down the road or in a totally different city.

CBC's Peter Mills spoke to people living in houses, condos and duplexes, and in cities, villages and First Nations.

'You're like an extended family'

Chief Cadmus Delorme is currently living in the same home on he grew up on Cowessess First Nation. Prior to that, he lived in multiple homes and apartments in Regina. Wherever he went, Chief Delorme brought a profound prospective when it comes to neighbours.

"You're not blood family, but because you share a communal area you have responsibilities," he said. 

"I've heard the horror stories of bad neighbours and I understand some of my neighbours were a little more aggressive than others, but I would always approach it as we share this communal area and you're like an extended family. So I'll respect you and you respect me."

'I can't think of a place better on earth to live'

Kathleen Ritchie lives in a duplex in Harris, Sask., which is about 80 kilometres southwest of Saskatoon and home to about 200 people. The 64-year-old said the community and her neighbours have dramatically changed her life for the better. Ritchie was so inspired by Harris that she delivered a handmade card to every home in the early months of the pandemic.

Prior to moving to Harris, Ritchie lived in Calgary for about five decades. When she moved to the village, she only knew one family there.

"The neighbours in Calgary — one being the best and 10 being the worst — were a 10. And in Harris ... one," she said.

"[In Calgary] I didn't even know the neighbours names on both sides. All of the time. None. The only time I knew the neighbour on one side, it was my roommate's sister-in-law. So yeah, totally different. Here [in Harris] I can name you everybody that lives up and down the street for two blocks, right up to Main Street and back. So it's incredible." 

'Don't tell them you love them'

Davy Sage is a recording artist and songwriter who lives in a condo in Regina. He was born in Kwara State in western Nigeria and moved to Saskatchewan when he was about 25 years old.

Sage had a laugh when thinking about one of the first things his sister said when it came to interacting with his neighbours in Regina.

"The night I came, she sat me down and she was like, 'David.' I said 'Yeah, what happened?' She said, 'If you don't love someone, don't tell them you love them because if you tell them you love them, they might think you love them. So don't go fooling around,'" he said.

"Where I come from, for example, it's typical for you to say, 'Good morning, good afternoon' when you see your neighbour. It's just normal. It's normal to have a chit-chat once in a while to see how things are going. That's the kind of world where I came from. And some people [in Saskatchewan] don't see that as something they should be doing.

"The pandemic obviously has changed a lot of things, because I could see my neighbour every day because I'm home, they're home, we all work from home these days. It's the new normal."

'We learn to really appreciate one another'

Sandra Kary lives in a house in Saskatoon's Nutana neighbourhood. Kary said her family quickly outgrew the house, but the neighbours keep them from moving anywhere else.

Kary is also at the heart of Saskatoon's Riversdale neighbourhood as the executive director of The Friendship Inn. When COVID-19 forced the community centre to completely overhaul its services, Kary said it also made her think differently about her neighbours.

"This is a time when we're all kind of struggling and our neighbours in need — our vulnerable neighbours — they actually say things like, 'We're used to the struggle.' For folks who have been vulnerable for a long time, it's almost like they say, 'We've been living in struggle for a long time and now you get to understand what that feels like just a little bit,'" she said.

"I think that's a pretty poignant thing to say."

Kary said struggle can teach us.

"We learn resilience and we learn to really appreciate one another, regardless of where we may be in what stage of life," she said.

"I think there's a real profound thing about working in [The Friendship Inn], because we learn from our neighbours, too. It's not just us serving them. They actually teach us lessons."

How is your relationship with your neighbours? Share your stories by emailing peter.mills@cbc.ca or tweet @TweeterMillsCBC. Follow The Neighbourhood Project for more stories and the 'Nominate Your Neighbour' contest running from June 1 to 11.