Regina public school principal comes out as gay to inspire hope, lead by example
Krystal McPherson said not honouring who she is was dehumanizing
Krystal McPherson sat in the meeting room for Regina Public Schools one week ago to introduce herself as a member of the board's diversity steering committee. But for her, it was more than that.
"My heart was racing. I was terrified and I knew that there was some support," McPherson told CBC Saskatchewan.
In an emotional speech to the board, McPherson said she's dedicated her 25-year career to creating safe spaces for others and was now ready to truly be herself.
"Coming to live my truth as a gay woman has been liberating, a sense of coming home. But it has also been laden with fear and uncertainty. Would I lose my job if people found out?" McPherson told the board on May 25.
"I no longer want to be afraid or othered or silenced, so I'm making a choice to step out of the shadows and hopefully lead by example. I know how important it is to be an ally, but now I know it's even more important to be a visible gay woman."
McPherson told the board she wanted to show people that it's okay to be wholeheartedly who you are and that all people belong and matter in the public school system.
Decision comes after Pride motion shut down
McPherson said she wanted to join the diversity steering committee because she has a lot to learn about anti-racism. She also said it was a response to the defeat by the previous school board of a controversial motion made in 2019 that would have allowed schools to celebrate pride how they see fit.
"I was so shocked and I couldn't believe that it had been defeated. And so once all the hurt and the fear subsided, I just said to myself, 'I can't sit around and wait in the shadows for the change. I have to be a part of the change,'" McPherson said.
McPherson was in those shadows for almost her entire life. She said it was due to fear. Fear about her children and how they'd be treated, how her family would react and if she would have her job as an educator if she were out.
"It's one thing to make a decision and know that you could be the one that has the consequences. But when others can suffer the consequences, it's just so much fear there," McPherson said.
McPherson said she has been thinking about coming out for some time. She was going to do it in 2019, until the Pride motion was shot down.
However, after working up the courage, she decided now was the time.
"As long as we're hiding, it's so dehumanizing. It's like we don't exist. And the truth is we do," she said. "I needed to live my truth. I have a very loving partner and she's a phenomenal human and she's the personification of love and warmth and kindness.
"She's my soulmate … she is the primary reason for that strength."
McPherson said she was tired of living in fear and of the shame of staying silent. She said she feels a sense of relief after coming out, and no longer has the sense of looking over her shoulder waiting for the other shoe to drop.
"I hoped that if there were children and families or honestly, young teachers, new teachers, old teachers who were in the same position as me, that they might feel like they had a safe place," McPherson said.
McPherson has been receiving a lot of feedback since coming out to the board. She said people she doesn't even know have been emailing her encouraging messages and parents have told her they feel their kids are safer now because she's there.
McPherson stressed that she is still just a typical person and being gay is just one part of her life. She said she hopes one day being gay or LGBTQ is more normalized.
When looking at the future, McPherson said she's hopeful. The next generation is questioning gender stereotypes and questioning gender as a construct, she said.
Heading into Pride month, McPherson said people should realize there are many LGBTQ staff, teachers and students.
"I hope that kids know and people know that you can be and do anything if you're gay or if you're trans or no matter what your diversity is, you can. You can be the principal of the school one day," she said.
"There is nothing wrong with who you are. You are a beautiful soul and you deserve to have a beautiful life."