Inuvik couple share lessons and 'precious memories' from 50 years of marriage

Albert Elias, an elder living in Inuvik, N.W.T., says it was love at first sight. 

He had travelled with about 60 other people from the community of Sachs Harbour to a jamboree on a June weekend in 1971, and there he laid eyes on Shirley. 

"I asked for a dance with her. I didn't know who she was, but we danced, and that's how we started," he told Meghan Roberts, the host of CBC's Northbeat. 

"From there, we've been together since."

The Eliases planned to mark their 50th wedding anniversary at the Ingamo Hall Friendship Centre in Inuvik on Oct. 15 with friends and family. 

But because of a rising number of COVID-19 cases in the community at the time, they cancelled those plans and celebrated alone instead. 

50 years of wisdom

Shirley and Albert shared some of the wisdom they've learned from spending half a century together.

Shirley said she had to learn how to express her thoughts and feelings. She was nervous at the start of their relationship, she said, and had only socialized with close friends and relatives when she was growing up.  

"I didn't really know how to live with people that were coming and visiting with us," she said. "I would just make something for them to drink, like tea or coffee, put cups out for them, and just leave them because I didn't know how to talk to strangers."

She laughed while reflecting on those "silly memories," and how far she's come.

"I learned to talk in the long-run, and then I started working with the community wellness programs which helped me a great deal." 

Albert said something that helped them over the decades was learning to make compromises. 

"We make plans and goals and objectives on certain things, and sometimes plans and objectives don't quite work out the way you want," he said. "It was hard to accept it at first, but then later on I learned to accept the challenges that faced me and just work things out. Don't stop going ahead."

They both agreed that raising four children created the fondest memories in their relationship together. 

"They were our precious, precious memories," said Shirley.

And now, they get to watch as their grandchildren and great-grandchildren grow up too. 

Another memory that makes Shirley smile is of the time that Albert first asked her to dance. 

"It was like a rock-and-roll dance," she said. The music, coming from a band of people she'd grown up with, was exciting — and Albert was a good dancer, she said.

The couple still plans to throw a party and celebrate the years they've spent together, starting from that moment.

"Whenever things are better again," said Shirley.