Sportsmanship in youth sports is shifting as parents become more invested, professor says

In the wake of a high-profile decision by Hockey Newfoundland and Labrador to ban post-game handshakes, sports experts say they're seeing a shift in youth sports culture across Canada.

Hockey N.L. announced Thursday that it had reversed its decision and would be reinstating the handshakes, but David Hancock, an associate professor in Memorial University's School of Human Kinetics and Recreation, says the problem starts at the top in youth sports, including hockey.

"We have a respect problem in hockey from the coaches down the line," Hancock told CBC News in an interview Jan. 12.

"Leadership is learned behaviour, and so is respect, so if kids see their parents being aggressive during the game, then they will act the same."

Hancock said parents investing significant amounts of money and time in minor sports is a part of the problem.

"Parents want a positive return on their investment, so they insert themselves," he said in an interview before Hockey N.L.'s reversal. 

"They want to see immediate progress from their child and demand that the coaches and refs make that happen."

Coaches in turn put high demands on their players, according to psychologist and hockey mom Dr. Shannon Edison, which can lead to aggressive interactions from the bench and create a culture of intense pressure at the rink.

"A shift in parenting has contributed to the shift in sports culture," said Edison.

If a parent often publicly disagrees with the referee and coach on their decisions, she says, the child won't learn how to advocate for themselves or see the need for self-improvement.

"Failure is a part of sports, and if they are not allowed to fail they will not see the need to improve."

She added the "pendulum has swung pretty far" in how some parents prepare children to face adversity.

"We've gotten to a place where there's been quite a lot of striving toward protection from unpleasant experiences," she said.

"Our role is to help kids to learn to tolerate distress, rather than prevent them from feeling distress."

If children aren't taught to deal with stress properly, say experts, it can come out in other ways — and in sports that includes aggressive and unsportsmanlike behaviour.

Parents and referees can help prevent that, but when they see problems on the ice or on the field, they often don't feel empowered to speak out against the aggressive parents who scream at refs and players, said Hancock.

Hancock says empowering people to speak up and correct poor behaviour — by a small minority of people — will create an environment of respect at the rink.

"You're probably looking at 90 per cent of players, 90 per cent of coaches, 90 per cent of parents, have that level of respect," he said. "[But] I don't know that a lot of them feel empowered to intervene and say, 'I will deal with this.' And that's where maybe there needs to be some attention on how we get people to stand up and say, 'That's not OK. You need to stop talking.'"

Hockey N.L. axes post-game handshakes to cut down on fights

11 months ago

Duration 2:04

Hockey Newfoundland and Labrador is facing pushback after moving post-game handshakes to before the puck drops to cut down on fights.

When Hockey N.L. announced its decision to eliminate post-game handshake in minor boys' games, it cited recent post-game incidents — specifics were not provided — that led to the suspension of players and coaches.

Hancock says the problem isn't limited to Newfoundland and Labrador. In Quebec and Ontario minor soccer leagues, referees wear body cameras to prevent abuse from parents and players. Many minor sports referees are minors themselves — as young as 14 — and are increasingly facing virulent comments from adults.

Hancock also sees a bigger problem evolving in minor sports.

"People are committing child abuse. I know that might sound extreme, but … the demographic of officials in most of your team sports sees about 30 to 40 per cent being 21 and under." 

The Signal53:00Sport culture in N.L.

Today's show looks at sports culture in this province. Host Adam Walsh starts with the elimination of the post-game handshake in hockey, then he asks what is happening with sports culture for that decision to have been made. What is needed from parents and coaches when it comes to leadership?

Every weekday, host Adam Walsh starts a new conversation on The Signal. It's a show about what's on your mind now, and what people aren't talking about … yet. The Signal will make you think, smile and learn more about the place you call home.

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