Afghanistan veteran launches book to help friends and family of PTSD sufferers

The wife of an Afghanistan war vet says a new book written by her husband about post-traumatic stress disorder was as helpful for him to write as they hope it will be for those who read it.

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Jamie MacWhirter, who deals with the effects of PTSD, has written A Soldier Returns: My Battle with PTSD, a guide to let friends and family know what to expect from someone living with the condition.

However, MacWhirter's wife Vanessa said she noticed the process of writing the book actually helped him with his own PTSD.

"It started off as therapy," she told the St. John's Morning Show. "It was a way for him to let go a little bit and to put feelings to paper — no judgment, no controversy."

MacWhirter, who's originally from Corner Brook, has already chronicled his 2006 deployment in Kandahar and subsequent troubles with PTSD in his memoir, A Soldier's Tale: A Newfoundland Soldier in Afghanistan.

While that book dealt mostly with the war itself, he now wants people to know what it's like trying to re-adjust to society while still suffering from the trauma of armed conflict.

"People with PTSD don't know how to explain it to their family members, so if someone's out there with PTSD, I wanted this book to be a tool for them," he said.

"I wanted them to take this book, give it to someone they love and say, 'If you want to know about PTSD, you read this book. This will tell you what the hell I'm going through.'"

Vanessa MacWhirter says she and Jamie have come a long way in dealing with the effects of his PTSD, but it wasn't always easy. She said there was a huge change in his personality, especially when he first came back to Canada from Afghanistan.

"Before Afghanistan, he was very outgoing, centre of attention," she said.

"Then when he came back, he would hide away in the house; it didn't matter who came, they weren't going to see him."

Being the flexible one

Perhaps the most trying moment for the couple came one day when they were bickering while getting ready for a walk. Jamie's anger got the better of him when he took something she said the wrong way, and he gave her a light shove.

Vanessa said that's when she drew the line, and made it clear that they needed to come up with strategies to avoid him getting angry with her like that.

One of the most useful things they've come up with is a "safe word" he can say when he's feeling the effects of his PTSD. For them the word is "turnip," and he can say it to let her and their children know what's going on, so that they understand he is uncomfortable and perhaps best left alone.

Vanessa said the most important thing a loved one can do is realize there will be limitations to what someone with PTSD can handle, and to accommodate them.

"It's being compassionate and being the flexible one," she said. 

"I have to be a lot more flexible when it comes to certain things — if he gets angry or triggered, if we are out and about and he gets a panic attack, we may have to get out of that [situation]."