Moncton boy urges families to consider adopting older children — like him

Colin Kennedy Robichaud's earliest memories are of moving from home to home to home.

"It was rough because I never really unpacked my bag. ... I didn't know if it was my last home, or if I was going to be adopted that day. I had no clue."

The 12-year-old Moncton boy, who spent years going between his birth family and foster families, was adopted four years ago by Jeff Kennedy and Yves Robichaud.

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On Monday, Colin will co-chair the New Brunswick Adoption Foundation's annual luncheon, which hopes to raise $80,000 as it works to find permanent homes for 400 children now in the care of the province.

"The first day of school I actually asked a couple of kids, 'How many homes have you been into?'" Colin said.

"They looked at me funny ... and that was when I sort of clued in — this is something that's not exactly normal."

For Robichaud and Kennedy, adopting a child was part of their plan and one year after they started the process, they were matched with Colin.

"The first time we met Colin we knew that he was going to be the perfect kid for us," Robichaud said.

'They do come with a past'

While he had dreamed of a "forever home," Colin said when it actually happened it was both exciting and nerve-racking.

Once you find that forever home, it's hard to really think, 'OK, stop worrying, you're not going to move again.'- Colin Kennedy Robichaud

"I didn't know if they were actually just another foster family or if they were actually my final family."

Yves Robichaud, too, describes the experience as nerve-racking but said he always felt confident about the decision to adopt an older child.

"I think at the end of the day, what kids in care are looking for extremely is love and attention, and if you're able to give that, everything should pan out," Robichaud said.

"They do come with a past. There are supports and help out there ... but in the future, all they're looking for is a permanent home, security and love — just like any other kids out there."

After moving around so much, it was difficult to settle in with his new family, Colin said.

"Once you find that forever home, it's hard to really think, 'OK, stop worrying, you're not going to move again.'"

Robichaud said Colin's anxieties are normal and part of what is known as the "testing" period, which all adoptive parents are taught to expect.

During the first six months, adopted children often wonder if their new parents will send them back, and Colin was no different.

When he and Kennedy told Colin they were going on a family vacation to Walt Disney World, he thought his new parents might leave him behind in Florida.

"His biggest worry, when we told him that we were going to go to Walt Disney the first time, is was he going to come back home after our vacation? So after we got back from vacation ... he relaxed and knew that it's the real deal and we didn't leave him behind."

Colin said he still worries about where he would go if something were to happen to Robichaud or Kennedy, although he tries to stay busy with football and other hobbies to avoid such thoughts.

"I don't really like to sit and think about stuff — I always like to be outside or doing something, keeping my brain going."

​Peer support needed for kids

Colin said he loves to meet other children who have been adopted or who have been in the care of the province, and he would like to see some kind of support group set up.

"I think there should be that opportunity ... if they're feeling like they're alone in the world, they can go talk to other kids that have been through what they've been through," he said. 

"They do have a support team of adults but the way I think of it is kid to kid ... not adult to kid, because a kid would have a different perspective on it than an adult."

Robichaud said his son is often told he is mature for his years, and Colin agreed.

"All of my friends say I could pass off as a 14-year-old in a 12-year-old's body."

As co-chair of the New Brunswick Adoption Foundation luncheon on Monday, Colin will share his story and encourage families who are considering adoption to consider an older child.

"I would say look into it and meet with the child," Colin said.

"Some people look at what happened in the past. They don't look at the future. They don't look at what this kid could do for you."