How to keep your kids from being bored in the summer

Parenting expert Alyson Schafer offers tips on how to keep the kids from being bored in the summer and explains why boredom is particularly bad for teens and tweens.

Schafer is the author of parenting books including Honey, I Wrecked The Kids, Breaking The Good Mom Myth and Ain't Misbehavin'. She spoke with the CBC's Conrad Collaco about the best things parents can do to keep their kids busy when school is out.

Here's an edited and abridged transcript of the interview with Schafer. You can listen to the full interview by clicking the image at the top of this page. Schafer has more parenting tips on her web site.

Alyson Schafer, parenting expert

Q: What bad things can bored kids get up to?

We know in the teen and tween years the brain undergoes some interesting changes. It starts to want to seek out thrills and adventures which is developmentally quite appropriate because these kids are supposed to be leaving the nest. But they cite boredom as the No. 1 reason why they drink. There's a real concern about underage drinking which goes up in the summer.

Q: How does this begin to develop in younger years?

We want to be able to teach kids how to make good decisions for themselves. Too often parents hear the plea of a child saying 'I'm bored' and we are the first people to jump in the car and run over to the Toys 'R' Us and buy something new to keep them preoccupied. We end up raising a generation of kids who don't know how to entertain themselves. That's a skill we have to develop in the early years. Don't be too quick to rescue them from boredom. I used to say to my kids 'this is the spark of creativity. Right now. Here it comes. It's coming.'

If I went to my parents and said 'I'm bored,' my dad would have said 'go cut the grass or wash the windows.' I think we need to step back and let them experience the necessary tension in order to get that spark of creativity to go so they learn to manage that down time better.

Q: What's the best way to get kids to find a way to beat their own boredom?

Make a group plan for your activities. Maybe it's a family bike ride. But, you look at all the other times in the day and you realize that there are blocks of time that are unscheduled. It's almost scheduled boredom time. Brainstorm with kids. What activities do you enjoy doing? What games in the games cupboard could you dust off? You can go online together and find an interesting game. Brainstorm but don't rescue them.

Q: What about keeping kids busy with household chores to prevent them from being bored?

Family time does not always have to be about entertainment. Having a common task can be quite fun. You might decide that you want to redecorate one of the kids' bedrooms. Show them how to use a paint brush. They love learning. Clean out the garage together. Build shelves. Getting an 11-year-old to use a power tool. That feels all kinds of crazy good. As our kids get older, they can work outside the home. They can baby sit. They can dog walk. Those types of experiences are very good for character development. 

Q: What advice do you have for parents who don't want their kids playing video games all summer?

So many parents hate the computer and think it's the decline of the human race. But you may be raising a child who may truly, truly have a passion for the computer just the same way a child may have a passion for horses or reading. It's OK to let them put some extra time into their hobby but you've got to have balance. Talk to them about what a reasonable amount of time would be to spend on their hobby and discuss how we might enforce that limit. Kids are more likely to respect limits if they had a say in creating those limits. Parents, remember there are all kinds of games online that are educational and teach collaboration. Minecraft is one of those.