Woman who survived 'Abbotsford Killer' devoted to helping others
The woman who survived the brutal 1995 attack by Terry Driver — the man dubbed the Abbotsford Killer — says being a victim of assault doesn't define her.
"Victims are stigmatized to feel sorry for themselves forever. And it wasn't really my thing. I didn't feel sorry for myself," Misty Cockerill, now 29 and a single mother of two young daughters, said Tuesday.
Cockerill was 15 when she and friend Tanya Smith, 16, were attacked by Driver in October 1995 in Abbotsford. Driver raped and killed Smith and clubbed Cockerill seven times on the head with a baseball bat when she tried to stop the sexual assault against Smith.
Driver then terrorized the Fraser Valley community with taunting phone calls to police and a local radio station, vowing to kill again. He was caught in May 1996.
Cockerill testified at the ensuing murder trial, and Driver was convicted in 1997 of the first-degree murder of Smith and the attempted murder of Cockerill. He was sentenced to a life term in prison and was designated a dangerous offender in 2000, permitting his indefinite incarceration.
'You can get by. You can overcome it. And you don't have to be the victim forever.' — Misty Cockerill
In an interview with CBC News on Tuesday, Cockerill said victims of assault should not be blamed for what happened to them.
"I don't play the victim or anything like that. I've accomplished quite a bit since, so that's not really a label for me," she said.
Cockerill has been volunteering for victims' services for a number of years and is working toward a diploma in social work. She hopes to graduate in December.
She said her ordeal made her learn a lot about herself and the support network that's available for assault victims in the province.
"I try not to bring my stuff into it. I can empathize with them, understand them a little bit more [and] have a little bit more knowledge," Cockerill said of her volunteer experience.
"Not that I'm any better than other any of the other volunteers. I just have, I guess, a different outlook."
Cockerill's positive outlook in life is shared by Rod Gehl, a retired police inspector from Abbotsford who took the first police call from Driver back in 1995.
"I knew right away what he was talking about because that was a description of where the attack had taken place," Gehl told CBC News on Tuesday.
"I said, 'Where are you getting this from?' And he said, 'Well, I'm the killer.' "
Gehl has just published a book, titled Through the Valley of the Shadow: The Search for the Abbotsford Killer, and hopes to raise funds for victims' services with the profits.
Advocate of victims' rights
Cockerill said she wants to enter the field of victims' services after her graduation.
"You can get by. You can overcome it. And you don't have to be the victim forever," she said.
"I would be happier with [being called] an advocate of victims' rights. That would be a better label than 'the survivor of the Abbotsford Killer.' "
A great way to heal herself mentally was giving interviews and speeches about her ordeal and "keeping myself out there," she said.
Cockerill still suffers from the after-effects of her brain injury and can't do all the things she used to excel in, such as mathematics.
"The only thing I really have a problem with now is the brain injury. You are fine one day, you are totally normal and there is nothing wrong, and then the next thing you know, there's certain things that you can't do anymore," she said.
But she said she's better off than many other crime victims and even calls herself lucky.
"At this point, I just want to be done school, do some more work with victim services, do some more victim advocacy work and watch my kids grow."