Online dating only gets more daunting the older you get — but this new program is guiding over-50s through it

Terry Green, 75, was married for 38 years, and has had a few relationships since her divorce, but nothing has stuck for the long haul. 

The Kamloops resident, like many other seniors, has dipped her toes into the world of online dating, but has learned that it isn't easy.

"You meet the odd nice one and they're really nice, and then you get the scammers or the married men that are much more interested in just talking because they're lonely and it's hard at this age," she said.

"You don't want to go into a short term relationship. You want the companionship as much as anything else."

Green isn't alone in her experience, said Catherine Schmidt, co-ordinator of adult services at the Thompson-Nicola Regional Library in the southern Interior city. 

That's why Schmidt decided to launch a program called Dating over 50, which starts Tuesday night, to try and help people who are looking for relationships or maybe just companionship.

"Individuals are asking the library staff for help setting up online dating profiles," she told Daybreak Kamloops host Shelley Joyce.

However, what's concerning, is some are asking library staff with assistance with wiring money to people they've met online.

"We're seeing that maybe they don't quite know what they're getting themselves into, or maybe they just aren't quite up to speed."

Schmidt got the idea for the course from a librarian in Chicago, Tina Williams, who started a similar program. 

"It just seems like such an amazing response in her community, we thought maybe our people could use it too," she said.

Dating sessions

So far there are three sessions being offered, with topics such as, general dating tips, online safety and health.

Anyone is welcome to come to the sessions, however the focus is mostly on people over the age of 50 who may not have as much experience with using online dating tools.

Schmidt said she's learned that the experiences of seniors are often quite comparable to younger people though, since both demographics are often using dating websites to meet people.

"There are many individuals both young and older who are meeting online because it almost feels safer because you're not putting yourself out there as much," she said.

However, one difference both Schmidt and Green have noticed is there tends to be more female seniors in the dating game than males.

"There are so many more women, especially older women these days because women live longer, and they want somebody. They don't necessarily want to get married again or have kids or anything like that, they just want a companion in their life,"said Schmidt.

"Maybe that means that yes, they want a long term relationship, maybe that just means they want to go on a date [and] hang out."

Local matchmaker Tara Holmes will be at the first session, and she will help attendees through the basics of dating and with figuring out what they're looking for. 

There will also be some games to help break the ice.

"The whole point of this is just to be approachable, fun, interactive," said Schmidt.

"Not only is this about teaching people how to date, but it's also making people feel comfortable with other people."