You should know the title of a book in case someone asks

So. You're getting coffee with a friend, just catching up, everything's casual. Until she drops the question you hoped nobody would ever ask: "What are you reading these days?"

What are you reading these days?! When's the last time you read a book?!

Your mind goes blank.

In this moment, you wonder if you have read a book in your entire life. Your eyes jet around the room. Table, chair, mug, window, door, umbrella. None of those is a book. Umbrella might be, but there's no way of knowing for sure. "Umbrella," you say.

No need to worry. Even I, a self-proclaimed writer, have never read a book. But we can get through this, and emerge better prepared for the next time someone at the staff party brings up "books" for some reason.

There are hundreds of books in the world, so thinking of just one can't be that difficult! And once we've got one, we are set for life. There is absolutely no shame in saying you are re-reading a book, for example [insert book].

If you're having trouble, try thinking of your favourite movie, as a lot of movies are based off books. My favourite movie is Speed, aaaaannd a quick Google search tells me....it's not based on a book. Damn.

Remember that if backed into the corner on this, we have the power to redefine what a book is. Pull a fast one on whoever made the mistake of talking to you and say the menu is your favorite book. Or their eyes! Yeah, look them dead in the eyes and tell them that their eyes are your favourite book. There is no way this can fail, and it might lead to a nice relationship.

Another tactic that I have dabbled in myself is to just say whatever word pops into your head. "Poet" for example, and then rush home to write the book yourself. Feel free to take inspiration from your favourite movie, Speed. You can publish it online as an ebook and your friend will be none the wiser. Just make sure it exceeds 200 pages or they will assume you don't know any long books, which is potentially worse than not knowing any books at all.

Some people don't want to know what your favourite book is — they just want to know what a book is. It's likely that they themselves don't know either. In this situation, I think we could get away with saying Speed.

Finally, you need to be confident. So what? So you don't know the title of a single book? Big deal. This doesn't make you any less worldly. It's just like what Chuck Palahniuk said in Fight Club:  

"Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned."

Oh my god, FIGHT CLUB IS A BOOK. Just say Fight Club!! And if you can memorize that quote like I have, that's even better.  

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