Inspired by Adam Sandler's Hanukkah song, Church of Scientology to make its own "fun holiday tune"
James Hartnett | CBC Comedy | Posted: December 13, 2016 4:14 PM | Last Updated: December 13, 2016
LOS ANGELES, CA—Faced with increasing levels of scrutiny and bad publicity, the Church of Scientology has been looking to find ways to improve its image.
To this end, some high-ranking church officials have noted the success of Adam Sandler's wildly popular Hanukkah song, first performed on Saturday Night Live in 1994.
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"Sandler's song was huge for Hanukkah and Judaism in general," said local Scientology leader Ray Bothwell. "I think our religion needs something like that. A fun, lighthearted song that lists how many celebrities are actually Scientologists. So I started writing one."
Though Bothwell has not yet finished the song, he believes he has come up with some great options for lyrics.
Tom Cruise and Beck / read Dianetics. We also have Danny Masterson from That 70's show / but that's a bit less impressive. - Ray Bothwell, Chairman of the Board of the Religious Technology Center
"Imagine this to the tune of the Hanukkah song," said Bothwell, strumming on an acoustic guitar. "John Travolta / tests for thetans / so does Juliette Lewis, Jenna Elfman and the lovely Laura Prepon."
"I have more. Check this out," added Bothwell. "Tom Cruise and Beck / read Dianetics. We also have Danny Masterson from That 70's show / but that's a bit less impressive."
"Still needs a bit of work," Bothwell shrugged.
If the Scientology song does end up becoming a hit, Bothwell is hopeful that more celebrities will consider joining the controversial religion.
"We have so many celebrities in our religion," Bothwell gushed. "And the great thing is, they're all totally happy with that choice and have totally not at all been blackmailed into staying in Scientology against their own free will. So the chance to celebrate them in song just made too much sense to pass up."
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