Aging parents set world record for most technical issues in single Skype call

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NORTH BATTLEFORD, SK—The tiny town of North Battleford, Saskatchewan, home to just 14,000 residents, awoke this morning to find a new celebrity couple in their midst. As of yesterday, Christine (54) and Edmond (59) Dunsmore became the Guinness World Record holders for Most Technical Issues in a Single Skype Call.
Earlier this year their eldest son Christopher moved from his hometown of North Battleford to Montreal for work. "I got them the tablet because I thought it would be a good way for us to keep in touch. I was wrong," lamented Dunsmore.
After only three video-chats he realized the device was going to cause more problems than it solved. "They just couldn't figure it out. It was like watching a horse try to eat a banana."
Dunsmore estimates that at least 52 minutes of every hour-long call is devoted to troubleshooting. The other eight minutes are for shit-talking family members.
After several painstaking months, Dunsmore decided to call the people at Guinness. Darren McCoy answered the call. "We sort of thought he was calling as a prank, but after watching a recent chat he recorded we knew we had something really special on our hands."
Within three days, McCoy flew to North Battleford to follow up with Christine and Edmond. "I've officiated a lot of records, but this one... You don't forget something like this." McCoy's official tally was 113 different issues in a 64-minute call. In an additional note, he observed that the phrase "hold on a sec" was uttered over four dozen times.
"At first it was just standard video and sound issues. Accidental button-pressing, muting, camera reversals. But then the call sort of took on a life of its own. Edmond dropped the tablet into a bowl of chips at numerous points. They somehow managed to make not one, but two, 911 emergency calls. And at one point Christine got so confused she was talking to the microwave for over four minutes. They truly deserve this record and their son should get a medal."
When asked what she thought about being a World Record holder Christine Dunsmore had this to say: "I dunno. Seems fine, I 'spose." While the interview took place, Edmond was quietly playing with the tablet until he excitedly exclaimed, "You know it's like a camera and a typewriter. And the solitaire!" before dropping the device into in an unseen bowl of chips.
The full scope of the World Record may never sink in for the Dunsmore family, but one thing is certain: it's only a matter of time before we are all horses trying to eat bananas, wondering why our children never call.
Some moms do know how to use Skype:

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