Furor over Luis Rubiales is not about a kiss, it's about women feeling safe playing a sport they love

Last week's end of the FIFA Women's World Cup gave us so much excitement and a new champion in Spain. We witnessed the host countries flourish with support, and we watched a team mobilize to win the greatest prize in women's football under tumultuous circumstances.

But we had hardly a moment to savour the joy before it was brutally snatched from the players and fans and completely overtaken by Luis Rubiales, president of the Spanish Football Federation (RFEF).

Since that moment when Rubiales aggressively kissed Spanish player Jenni Hermoso at the trophy ceremony, we have seen the situation descend into what can only be described as a wretched plot from a B-grade telenovela.

In no short order, there was an offering of a non-apology apology from Rubiales (complete with girl dad narratives), incorrect statements issued by RFEF, staff resigning in protest, a suspension by FIFA, and team head coach Jorge Vilda supporting — then distancing himself — from Rubiales, who is so bound to his own ego that the entire federation is at risk of imploding. All while Spain is pursuing co-hosting the 2030 World Cup.

I didn't even get to the part where Rubiales's mother (yes, his mother) has holed up in a church on a hunger strike in protest of the "inhuman hunt" against her son. It sounds absurd and laughable, but the situation is not funny. It's frustrating and deflating, but also unsurprising. 

Last week, instead of celebrating in Ibiza as she should have been, Hermoso released a statement that the kiss from Rubiales was not consensual — he claims he asked her and she agreed.

How could it have been in the nanosecond of interaction on the stage and with this type of power dynamic? Would she even have felt comfortable saying no, particularly to a man who supported the same coach many players on the team wanted gone? The same man that is part of a tradition of frustration and disrespect to women's soccer in Spain.

The entire situation reeks of men holding power, the sheer absence of accountability and about a historic moment that has been bulldozed by a federation that seems it will protect that man at whatever cost. Of the 140 members of the RFEF, only six are women.

There is a growing army of women and allies supporting women players who are fed up with a system of misogyny and chauvinism in Spain. Different leagues, players and athletes have taken to social media to declare their support for Hermoso. Even players like Iker Casillas, Andres Iniesta and the legendary Xavi (now head coach of Barcelona FC) have spoken out about Rubiales in an unprecedented manner.  

The situation has caused such a scandal that Yolanda Díaz, Spain's second deputy prime minister, said: "Those who applauded Rubiales, [at the assembly] in my opinion, should not continue in their positions."  

Now Spanish prosecutors have declared that they will begin a preliminary investigation into whether the kiss can be considered sexual assault.

But it is not just about a kiss. 

It is about women and girls feeling safe to play a sport they love. It is about players who work so hard to be the best in the world but have to shorten their happiest moment in order to navigate a completely chaotic mess. It is about how women can never be just athletes, they need to be advocates and protectors of each other and "pick the right battles."

It is about the other survivors, like those in Haiti, Afghanistan and Zambia, who got very little attention from football media when they spoke out about sexualized violence in their federations and whose longing for justice remains unrequited. FIFA did very little to protect them — just as it does the least possible now.  At the time of writing this, neither FIFA nor UEFA (Rubiales is conveniently the UEFA vice-president) has yet to make a public statement. 

It is about feeling like a sport doesn't love you back when there are hordes of people in power protecting disingenuous people and deplorable characters. We should consider that Spain is a federation that might have so much to hide that they can't risk turning their backs on Rubiales, who might metaphorically stab them back. But the twists and turns keep coming and just days after they applauded him, the RFEF is demanding that Rubiales resign. 

We have the chance to make this moment about legacy. Young girls are watching their favourite players bravely support a player who was wronged in front of the world. The lesson can be about bravery and a series of voices that has become a global chorus and now an uprising and one that could be Spanish football's own reckoning with abuse.

It makes me wonder where Canada sits and how we could prevent this kind of mess from happening. Are we doing what's best for our current players, and creating better spaces for future ones? 

In the last few years women's soccer has become increasingly popular. This Women's World Cup was the most successful to date, but there remains so much wrong with men in the women's soccer ecosystem. There are people who refuse to make it better and their entitlement and arrogance may hurt soccer for a long time.

Great play of Spanish team overshadowed

Rage may fuel a revolution but is it justice that we will finally see? Will it be a warning to other men who disrespect women on the pitch, behind closed doors, or will this circus continue to be a frenzy of men of power trying to save themselves while imploring their female relatives to help them? 

Spain have only been world champions for a little more than a week but will we remember their clinical attacking in play? Will we regale about their tiki taka and perfect passes that were so beautiful they made us gleeful? Will we remember a final of stellar goalkeeping? 

At this point, we are in danger of remembering this World Cup with Rubiales as the front man. I hope as we go forward we remember it as a tournament that ignited an uprising; an uprising that resulted in more power and agency for women. And a movement that is as beautiful and powerful as the game itself.