RIP five sex geckos sent into space by the Russian space agency
Below, you will find the late George Jones, with the tearjerkingest song ever performed: "He Stopped Loving Her Today". Those of you who aren't already weeping into a sinkful of dishes clearly don't know why, in the song, he stopped loving her. Spoiler alert: he died. ...
Below, you will find the late George Jones, with the tearjerkingest song ever performed: "He Stopped Loving Her Today". Those of you who aren't already weeping into a sinkful of dishes clearly don't know why, in the song, he stopped loving her. Spoiler alert: he died.
We're sending this out to five sex geckos sent into space by the Russian space agency -- and we're playing it because there is no song called "He Stopped Loving Them At Some Unknown Point Over the Past Two-And-A-Half Months".
In mid-July, Russia launched a satellite containing, among other things, the geckos -- one male, four females.
The plan was to answer a question that has plagued all of us who've laid on our backs, pondering the infinite mystery of space: how zero gravity would affected the sex lives of lizards.
We followed the mission closely, and brought you updates when the space agency lost, and then regained, contact with the satellite.
Today, we have sad news: the satellite's landing apparatus has come back to Earth, and all five geckos aboard are deceased.
According to one Russian expert, the sex geckos froze due to an equipment failure, at some unknown point. An emergency commission will determine exactly what happened, why, and when.
It's a depressing development -- more for the reptiles, of course, than for us.
Rest in peace, sex geckos. We hope you got to fulfill part of your mission, before you began giving each other the extremely cold shoulder.
RIP Sex geckos - seen here in their habitat (Photo:ROSCOSMOS)