Comedy·STYLE

Hot trend alert: Carrying tension in your jaw

Every fashionista knows that when it comes to trends, it’s not what you carry, but where.
(Shutterstock / Damir Khabirov)

Every fashionista knows that when it comes to trends, it's not what you carry, but where. The current trend-du-jour is no exception. Everyone who's anyone is totally carrying tension in their jaw.

For years the style elite and the overwhelmed alike have taken to carrying stress spread out over several parts of their bodies, whether it's the eye twitch that develops from dealing with the unwanted touch of a co-worker or tensing your spine as your mother asks you the same question several times. But wherever you carried that stress in the past is moot because 2018 is definitely going to be the year of the jaw.

Instagram trend forecaster Suzanne Scheer claims she knew this trend was happening long before it surfaced. "When a bunch of celebs started dying in 2016 I could feel the tension mounting in my neck. But by the fall of 2017, when it felt like half of the entertainment industry had been accused of sexual harassment, it had fully overtaken my jaw. My day-to-day pretty much deals with attempting to release my jaw, or accidentally cracking it and feeling hot, searing pain for several moments, and I've never felt cooler."

The tense jaw trend – or as it's called among those in the know, "the world is so dysfunctional my jaw won't open" – is moving full speed ahead and shows no signs of slowing down.

Editor-in-chief of Chatelaine magazine Vanessa Messing confirms this belief: "It's just so easy to do. Unlike other trends that cost thousands of dollars, tensing your jaw is a snap. I've been able to keep mine nice and tight because I am a female in a leadership position, and boy, does that irk people. If one more person second-guesses a decision of mine, I feel like my jaw will literally explode like a geyser. I'm officially the hippest person I know!"

Vogue has gotten in on the craze with its recent article, "The Top 10 Ways to Pull Off Tension in Your Jaw". The list includes: Being too lazy and/or poor to own comfortable pillows to sleep on; dating someone who emotionally destroys you; taking public transit only in rush hour; living next door to a house that's under construction; forgetting then remembering that Trump is president; forgetting then remembering that Barack Obama is not president; and realizing climate change is happening and it's too late to do anything about it.

Many consider the best part of this trend is that it's an ongoing battle, so you might as well lean in and let that jaw fuse your mouth shut.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Alessandra Vite began studying improv at age fourteen at The Second City and is a graduate of the The Second City’s Conservatory Program. She has performed with The Second City Touring Company, and is the current Head Writer and performer of the Comedy Bar produced show "Sunday Night Live with The Sketchersons." Alessandra is also a contributor for the websites The Beaverton, CBC Comedy and CBC Radio's "Because News".