Impossible Math by Michelle Spencer
CBC Books | | Posted: September 15, 2021 1:30 PM | Last Updated: September 15, 2021
2021 CBC Nonfiction Prize longlist
Warning: This story includes discussion of suicide.
Michelle Spencer has made the 2021 CBC Nonfiction Prize longlist for Impossible Math.
The winner of the 2021 CBC Nonfiction Prize will receive $6,000 from the Canada Council for the Arts, have their work published on CBC Books and have the opportunity to attend a two-week writing residency at the Banff Centre for Arts and Creativity. Four finalists will each receive $1,000 from the Canada Council for the Arts and have their work published on CBC Books.
The shortlist will be announced on Sept. 22 and the winner will be announced on Sept. 29.
If you're interested in the CBC Literary Prizes, the 2022 CBC Short Story Prize is open for submissions until Oct. 31.
About Michelle Spencer
Michelle Spencer is a writer and small business owner living in Pincher Creek, Alta. She is a former broadcast journalist and digital storytelling facilitator. She holds a BA in political science and a BA in journalism and communications from the University of Regina. She is currently completing a collection of linked short stories. Spencer lives with her husband on an acreage at the foot of the Rockies.
Entry in five-ish words
"Acceptance when knowing isn't possible."
The story's source of inspiration
"When my brother-in-law died by suicide, it took me a long time to accept that we would never know exactly why it happened. Questioning is a normal part of grieving, and certainly was not unique to me. But as I worked at focusing on Bruce's life, rather than how he died, I came to realize that the assumptions and limitations built into how we speak about suicide were perhaps holding me back — and that maybe others were having this experience too."
First lines
On a fine spring day in 2017, my brother in-law pulled off of a busy thoroughfare and came to a stop under a nondescript bridge. I've been to the spot since then. The road feels like it's about to break free of the city and the vehicles whip by at highway speed. He found a refuge just a few feet away from the traffic. It's an ugly spot but one of those places you'd be thankful for if you had a flat tire, or needed cover in a storm.
On a fine spring day in 2017, my brother in-law pulled off of a busy thoroughfare and came to a stop under a nondescript bridge.
It was a Friday and he had a 10 o'clock tee time. It had rained lightly in the night but the day was bright. By late afternoon, he and my sister would be on their way to visit my husband and I, at our acreage.
About the 2021 CBC Nonfiction Prize
The winner of the 2021 CBC Nonfiction Prize will receive $6,000 from the Canada Council for the Arts, have their work published on CBC Books and attend a two-week writing residency at the Banff Centre for the Arts and Creativity. Four finalists will each receive $1,000 from the Canada Council for the Arts and have their work published on CBC Books.
The 2022 CBC Short Story Prize is currently open for submissions until Oct. 31, 2021. The 2022 CBC Nonfiction Prize will open in January and the 2022 CBC Poetry Prize will open in April.
If you are thinking of suicide or know someone who is, here are ways you can get help:
- Canada Suicide Prevention Service: 1-833-456-4566 (Phone) | 45645 (Text) | crisisservicescanada.ca (Chat)
- In Quebec (French): Association québécoise de prévention du suicide: 1-866-APPELLE (1-866-277-3553)
- Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868 (Phone), Live Chat counselling at www.kidshelpphone.ca
- Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention: Find a crisis centre
If you feel your mental health or the mental health of a loved one is at risk of an immediate crisis, call 911.