Newcomer parents balance raising child with Nigerian traditions and new ones they've made in Canada
Adeoluwa Atayero | CBC News | Posted: February 11, 2021 1:31 AM | Last Updated: February 11, 2021
Newlyweds found out they were pregnant shortly after they moved to Regina
Over the course of Black History Month, we are hoping to learn more about the rich dynamics of the Black experience in Regina through the stories of people from different backgrounds and professions.
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Grace and Samuel Bajomo have had their share of major life changes over the past year.
They arrived in Regina August 2019 — months before a global pandemic — after tying the knot back home in Nigeria. Between dealing with the realities of the new weather and searching for jobs, they had a rocky time adjusting to their new environment.
When they were finally starting to find their feet, their world began to shift again.
Grace, who studied linguistics and communication, decided she would begin a YouTube channel to display her passion. She was all set to launch her channel — OmoBee's Lifestyle, which focuses on her experiences as a newcomer in Canada — when she found out she was pregnant.
"I was very active but when I got pregnant, everything went from 100 to ten per cent. I threw up every time I stepped out to go to work. People say snow has no smell but I could smell it and it made me nauseous," she said.
As Grace was experiencing the challenges of the first trimester, the world was also figuring out how to deal with the coronavirus.
"Thankfully I had my sister-in-law and her daughters to help me out and, of course, my husband. He's a superhero," she said.
Raising their child on their own terms
Grace's son David was born in June. As he begins to reach significant milestones, Grace and Sam now have yet another adjustment to make: which Nigerian traditions they will be passing down to their little boy and which ones they will do without.
Grace says David will be raised to enjoy Canadian meals — even the ones she struggles with.
The couple, however, intends to keep their son grounded in his roots.
"He's also going to grow up eating all the foods that we eat back home so that when we visit they won't be strange to him," Grace said.
They also want him to speak their native language, Yoruba, fluently.
"We have started speaking the language to him even though he's too young to understand," Grace said.
One tradition they were raised with that they will not be passing on to their child is spanking.
"We will not be doing that to him. We want him to be able to talk to us like a friend," Grace said. "There will be respect, but we don't want him to fear us."
Samuel also wants their son to be able to come to them if he has any issues without being scared of being spanked.
"There are many other ways to discipline a child without taking it to the extreme or doing it like it was done when we were growing up," Samuel said. "We plan to raise our boy in a godly way, and instill discipline into him without too much force, hoping and praying he grows up to be a great kid."
Looking back at a different time
Grace and Samuel remember the lockdown fondly as a time when their union was strengthened and they got to really bond with each other.
"We had just gotten married, so during the lockdown we got to know each other better," Grace said. "We cared for each other every minute and that helped us."
For Samuel, it was a worthwhile experience to be able to go through the pregnancy period with his wife. Being able to see his baby boy delivered is a moment that he cherishes dearly.
"On the day she gave birth, I was right there," Samuel said. "Seeing your wife give birth, through the pain and the labour and seeing the baby come out right in front of you — it was an emotional experience. It made our bond stronger because we were there for each other."
WATCH | This OmoBee's Lifestyle video tackles things to consider before moving to Canada:
Since the year began, Grace relaunched her YouTube channel. Her plan is to create content that will help people who are thinking of migrating to Canada, and eventually share her motherhood experience with her viewers.
For more stories about the experiences of Black Canadians — from anti-Black racism to success stories within the Black community — check out Being Black in Canada, a CBC project Black Canadians can be proud of. You can read more stories here.