Jennifer Hillier's dark fiction: 'I'm fascinated with who people really are when they think nobody's watching'
CBC Books | | Posted: July 12, 2018 1:31 PM | Last Updated: January 2, 2019
Jennifer Hillier is a Toronto-based novelist. Her novels — including Wonderland, Creep, Freak and The Butcher — tend to veer into dark, psychological thriller territory. Jar of Hearts, her latest novel, weaves a tale of three best friends who find themselves forever linked by secrets, crime and murder.
Below, the bestselling thriller writer takes the CBC Books Magic 8 Q&A and answers eight questions submitted by eight of her fellow writers.
1. Lynn Coady asks, "What are the common themes (or settings, symbols, etc) you always seem to come back to in your fiction (eg. bears, wrestling and Vienna in John Irving novels)? Where do those elements come from and what makes them so tenacious?"
I'm fascinated with who people really are when they think nobody's watching. We all have a personality that we allow others to see, and it shifts depending on where we are and who we're with — we behave one way at work, another way at home with our families, and we may show different sides of ourselves when we're with friends. But who are we when we think no one's looking? What are we really thinking, without the filters of what's acceptable to say out loud? My stories tend explore this (and since I write psychological thrillers, the theme of "secrets and lies" is also a big one).
In terms of setting, all my stories are set in the Pacific Northwest. I spent eight years living in Seattle, and there's always been something about the rain and evergreens that sets the mood for my books.
2. Méira Cook asks, "Is creativity a gift or a pathology? Something else?"
I think it's both, honestly. It's as much a blessing as a curse. It's a gift to be able to invent fictional people with complex lives and behaviours and motivations, and write stories about them, weaving in experiences from my own life to make it relatable (or maybe palatable is a better word). It's also a curse because sometimes I can't shut it off. In real life, we all have backstories. The lady buying avocados at the grocery store? Who does she go home to at night? The guy walking home at midnight? Why is he out so late? Relentless curiosity can be exhausting.
3. Vincent Lam asks, "Does your personal relationship with your characters change over the course of writing a book? If so, how?"
It does change, and often, but I always start by believing that my protagonists are good people. Even if they're flawed and have done terrible things I can't relate to, I believe there's goodness there — and if I didn't, I think it would be really hard to build a story around them. In Jar of Hearts, I was rooting for Georgina at the beginning. She's on trial for a horribly violent crime she participated in years ago as a teenager, but I wanted to believe that maybe she was forced into a situation she couldn't control, so I could keep telling her story. But midway through, I started to wonder. And by the end of the book, I wasn't sure if she was as much as a villain as the actual villain (but of course that's up to the reader to ultimately decide).
4. Jalal Barzanji asks, "How many times do you revise your manuscript before you submit it for publishing?"
Every manuscript I've written goes through at least two drafts before I send it to my agent, and there may be one more before she passes it along to my editor. From there it goes through three to four edits before the book is officially published. I've gotten a bit smarter with my writing over the past five books, though. I revised my first manuscript seven times before I started looking for an agent.
5. Ausma Zehanat Khan asks, "What form of writing would you love to attempt even though you're secretly terrified by it?"
What a great question. I would love to write a children's book. I read to my three-year-old son every night, and there are times when I find myself mentally editing the books as I read aloud, wondering what would happen if the story went in a different direction instead.
There's an art to children's books, though — kids are a tough audience! The stories have to be engaging, but not too complex, with quick sentences that convey a lot of meaning in very few words. The stories can't be too long or too short, but there still needs to be an arc, and the main character needs to grow in some way by the end. Ideally, the child will learn something from the book (about friendship, sharing, the importance of trying new foods, etc.). And if it rhymes, even better. That's a tall order. I feel like kids' books are way harder than writing books for adults.
6. Elisabeth de Mariaffi asks, "Are you a dreamer? Do you remember your dreams – and if so, are they notions or vivid with detail? Do you have a recurring dream?"
My dreams are extremely vivid, and I dream every night and remember them about 90 per cent of the time. Mostly, my dreams are enjoyable, like watching movies that I'm starring in. The only time I didn't enjoy dreaming was when I was pregnant. I don't know if it was the hormones or what, but almost all my dreams were terrifying and violent, and it was actually pretty awful.
I do have a recurring dream. I'm in a hotel, and I'm trying to get back to my room. But when I do, my key card doesn't work. So I get another one at the front desk, but when I try to take the elevator back up to my floor, it's not working. So I take the stairs, but the doors to each floor aren't labelled, and I lose count, and end up on the wrong floor. So I ask for directions, but the only person I can find is annoyed that I'm asking and isn't any help. When I think I'm almost on the right floor, the power in the hotel goes off, and I can't see the room numbers. And on and on it goes. Finally, after what feels like hours, I finally find my room. I let myself in… only to discover that someone else's stuff is in it.
The setting changes. Sometimes I'm in a shopping mall, or a high school, or in college. I'm trying to get somewhere, and just can't. A classic anxiety dream, or so I was told. I wake up exhausted.
7. Ivan Coyote asks, "What is one story that is rattling ghosts around in your head, but for whatever reason, you haven't tackled it yet?"
Believe it or not, I don't have one! And I actually wish I did. But unlike most writers I know, I don't get a ton of ideas. I have friends who get so many good story ideas, they carry around a notebook to keep them all straight. But me? I'm lucky if I get one decent story idea a year. At the moment, everything I've wanted to write has been written, except for the book I'm currently working on.
8. Louise Penny asks, "Do you use real people as inspirations for your characters?"
Yes, but I don't usually realize it until long after the book is published, and I've gotten some serious emotional distance from it. In Jar of Hearts, Georgina and Angela are blends of several girls I knew in high school, and also a couple I didn't, but observed from afar. And the character of Cat, who's a fellow inmate that Geo becomes close friends with in prison, was inspired by my Aunt Helena, who died of cancer years ago.
You know what's crazy? I didn't realize Cat was Aunt Helena until just now. Wow.