Former Canucks goalie Corey Hirsch opens up about struggle with OCD
Roshini Nair | CBC News | Posted: February 20, 2017 9:58 PM | Last Updated: February 20, 2017
‘I realized that there are so many other people out there that need to hear this'
Former Vancouver Canucks goalie Corey Hirsch says he's going public with his battle with obsessive-compulsive disorder to show those struggling there is hope.
Hirsch described his experience with obsessive-compulsive disorder in a first-person essay on The Players' Tribune published on Friday.
He told CBC's The Early Edition about the exact moment when his first "dark" thought happened.
"All of sudden, the thought popped into my head. You just start paying attention to it. Then it gets scarier and scarier and you can't get rid of it," he said.
"I know the exact day and the exact time, exactly where I was, when it happened."
Hirsch, then a 21-year old third goalie for the New York Rangers, was at a bar in Washington D.C. on May 6, 1994, in between Game 3 and 4 of the Easter Conference finals.
The New York Rangers went on to win the Stanley Cup that year. Hirsch went on to play for the Vancouver Canucks, the Washington Capitals and the Dallas Stars. He won a silver medial with Team Canada at the 1994 Winter Olympics, and a bronze at the 1995 World Championships.
"When it happened, I didn't have any resources to know what it was," he said. "I knew to hide it because it was wrong in my brain and that is how people felt. We don't have to be like that any more to reach out and get help."
Years-long struggle
Hirsch said he struggled for years with his dark thoughts, including a suicide-attempt where he almost drove a sports car off a Kamloops cliff.
"Hockey was a sanctuary for me because when I got on the ice, that was all I could focus about," he said.
"There's lots of high-end athletes out there that have issues. But it's also part of what makes them good. The adrenaline, the anxiety, the worry I had was part of what made me good on the ice."
Eventually, Hirsch was diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder and able to seek treatment during his time with the Vancouver Canucks.
Hirsch said he was spurred to go public now because of a recent meeting with a young player.
"I met a player about six months ago and I was sitting having coffee with him and he was going through struggles. I just spewed out my story to him and he looked at me in shock and said I've never told anybody this but I have the same problems," he said.
"I realized that there are so many other people out there that need to hear this."
At this point in his life, Hirsch said he's in "a really good place" and hoped that his successful career both as a hockey player, coach and NHL analyst could provide some hope for people going through similar issues.
"There is help available. I want people to look at my story and say you know what, I can be successful and I can do things."
With files from The Early Edition
To listen to the interview, click on the link labelled Former Canucks goalie Corey Hirsch on going public with his OCD