The Butler Is In: Keeping classy at the office Christmas party

Certified etiquette consultant John Robertson says it's a business meeting in disguise

Image | Office Christmas party

Caption: If this is his second drink, he shouldn't finish it, etiquette expert John Robertson says. (© Ulrik Tofte, thinkstock.com)

Will your behaviour at the office Christmas party get you on Santa's nice list or maybe get you a lump of coal in your stocking?
John Robertson, etiquette expert and professional butler who spends part of his year on Prince Edward Island, offers his tips on how to comport yourself at the holiday shindig.

1. Treat it like a business meeting

The office Christmas party is only disguised as a social event. It's actually a business meeting with drinks and food, and it's as much a part of your job responsibilities as any other meeting called by your boss, said Robertson.
So unless you've got a really well-established, long-standing unavoidable previous engagement, like brain surgery, consider attendance mandatory.
And because it's a business event, keep the "business" in your choice of what you wear. That depends on the culture of your office, but dress at the upper end of what you'd call business formal.

2. Greet your host

If there's no receiving line, seek the host out.
You get bonus marks if you do it before you get yourself a drink, so you don't have a wet clammy hand to shake hands with.

3. No touching beyond handshakes

Kisses on the cheek might be appropriate in France, but at a business function in North America shaking hands is the only acceptable touching allowed.
Both men and women can avoid determined kisses by locking an elbow when shaking hands.
Handshakes should be accompanied by direct eye contact. Don't look over their shoulders to see who else is here.

4. Mingle

You don't want to spend the evening talking only to people you already know. Use the party to introduce yourself to senior managers and meet people from other departments.
Meet your colleagues's spouses and partners, and remember that they have lives, too. They're not just appendages to your colleagues.
Any question that might appear on a government form or a mortgage application is not a great conversation opener. Stick with holiday plans, children and common interests — nothing that's going to offend or embarrass. And, of course, skip the politics and religion.

5. Easy on the food and drink

If you remember nothing else about going to the office Christmas function, remember this: enjoy the hospitality in moderation.
Men shouldn't finish their second drink and women shouldn't finish their first. Most people know their limit. Stay under it at the office party.
You can go back to the buffet all you want, but don't pile your plate high with everything.
Finally, avoid the temptation to juggle both a glass and a plate of food. It's an accident waiting to happen and not a good look.

6. Be gracious

The invitation usually states the end time as well the starting time. That's your clue. By that time, you should be finding your host to say, "Thank you" and taking your leave.
The day after the event write a thank you note to the evening's host. It will distinguish you in the workplace as a confident, knowledgeable employee with superlative social skills.