We're all happy for our friend Jenny. She went from ugly stepsister to Sleeping Beauty practically overnight, leaving you in the dust where you now live vicariously through her very active Instagram account. Now that her bad skin and permanent case of bedhead are things of the past, what do you two even have in common anymore? Don't panic. Here are a few conversation starters designed to keep your newly liberated BFF from slipping through your fingers.

Can you believe the failed athlete got engaged to the busty twit? Wait – Jenny didn't watch? But it was the FINALE! Okay. Deep breath. Don't worry about it. You can recap everything for her when she's back from her honeymoon in Bali. See? She still needs you! And your wedding invite must have gotten lost in the mail is all. No big deal. You and Jenny are fine!

Jenny is your very best subject, so keep the focus on all things Jenny. Her new husband Matt, her adorable cocker spaniel puppy, her immaculately decorated townhouse, her adorable baby bump, her perfect skin, how her skin could easily fit right over your skin…. God, don't you wish sometimes that you could just BE Jenny? Tell her how much you want to be her!

It might take a little extra work on your part to actually create the connection. First, lure Jenny into your shed with some soft cheeses. Once she's inside, bolt the door and then just keep driving it home that the outside world doesn't exist. Eventually she won't even remember that stupid, fancy pillowcase and it'll be just you and Jenny, forever. She'll give birth to her baby and raise him in your shed and it'll be just like Room except without the worst part: the escape.

You know – the very serious and eternally binding pact you two made when you were 15? She swore an oath in her own blood that she'd never leave you, so she can't just move to the suburbs and not tell you which one. She made a promise to you AND Satan so make sure you relay your concerns about this to the rest of the coven. Perhaps at the upcoming council you could pencil yourself in as the next sacrifice in Jenny's name. Her birthday IS coming up after all and it would be a nice surprise. It's all for you Jenny. It's all for you!

Keep in mind that deep inside she's still the same toilet-face Jenny you went to high school with. No amount of silk could ever keep you two apart, so don't let her forget it!