Mary Caesar unpacks her pickup truck after the five-hour drive from Watson Lake, Yukon.

The truck overflows with canvasses and easels.

"The life of an artist" she says wryly.

Caesar is among the artists at this year's Adäka Cultural Festival in Whitehorse. She's the only one from the Liard First Nation.

There are two sides to her work. One is peaceful and idyllic. Another is much darker.

First let's talk about the happy work. Caesar is known for paintings of people playing traditional games. One painting, called Ahda Cho Stick Gambling at Coffee Lakes, is part of Yukon's permanent collection. It's displayed at the Whitehorse Airport in the departures lounge.

In the painting the people are smiling. There are elders and children. The sun shines as people enjoy a perfect summer day by the campfire.

"I started painting stick-gambling paintings several years ago because I felt it was one of our cultural games, our traditional games. I wanted to preserve our culture through our paintings. To me it's important to paint the Kaska Dena people playing the traditional games because our people are a happy people despite all the hardships we endure," she says.

Caesar says these happy paintings are her wish for the future. They're a painting of the way things should be.
But there is another side to Caesar's paintings that is intensely more painful.

In the back of the truck she find the piece she's looking for. A large canvas. It's one she has carried for ten years.
This piece has darker colours. Purples and blacks. There are additions that latch on the painting with velcro. There is a mask which is painted white with bloody tears. There is a whip. And there is a dreamcatcher.

Image | Mary Caesar art.JPG

Caption: This work by artist Mary Caesar represents her experience in residential school. She would return years later alienated from her parents, unable to make sense of the world. (Philippe Morin/CBC)

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The message is immediate. The mask is her self-portrait. A child painted white.

The whip, she says, symbolizes the brutality of residential school; the violence and subjugation inflicted on aboriginal people.

Caesar was 4 years old when she was taken from family and brought residential school in Lower Post, B.C. She would return years later alienated from her parents, unable to make sense of the world. Today she still carries the trauma of that experience.

The art is therapeutic, but "the residential school paintings don't sell," she says.

Caesar says the conversation is changing in aboriginal art. She says she's starting to see more acceptance of art with darker and more personal themes.

"Ten years ago I brought this painting to Whitehorse but people were not ready," she says. "Some people were just shocked. I remember there was one guy who saw my painting and he just looked away. He didn't want to look. A woman saw my painting and just cried. It's a strong reaction."

On Monday Caesar is giving a talk about art at the Adäka Cultural Festival.

Interestingly, Caesar says there is a market for her darker art — overseas. She has sold a residential school-themed painting to the Nordamerika Native Art Gallery in Zurich, Switzerland and has a book of poetry published in Germany.

As an artist she says she'll continue to explore all sides of the palette. She says she constantly paints in a certain duality. Her hope for the future, the trauma of her past. Light and dark. Memories which are painted black and purple like a old bruise and a wish for the future, painted with the bright colours of the Medicine Wheel.

CBC North is profiling artists this week as part of the Adäka Cultural Festival. Watch for more as the festival continues.