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Other People's Problems

Vanessa: Raising a child with special needs

Vanessa’s daily life is difficult. Between coping with the demands of work and raising a daughter with special needs, Vanessa is falling into old patterns of negative thinking and self-silencing. Can she learn to break old patterns and recognise her own feelings of loneliness?
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Vanessa’s daily life is difficult and draining. (Ben Shannon/CBC)
Other People's Problems30:33Vanessa: “The life I have isn’t working”

"Life is hard to do alone and I've felt so lonely." - Vanessa

Vanessa's daily life is difficult. Between coping with the demands of work and raising a daughter with special needs, Vanessa is falling into old patterns of negative thinking and self-silencing. But can she learn to break those patterns by recognising and releasing the feelings of loneliness and neglect she held as a child?

Listen for:

  • Hillary encourages Vanessa to feel the complexity of multiple feelings at once. Humans can and do experience many emotions at the same time, and that's okay.

  • How hard it is for Vanessa to take in compliments and love because of a defence she has used to get her through times when others haven't been there for her. Hillary asks Vanessa to practice receiving affection; it's a skill that needs to be exercised just like any other.

  • How to praise kids so they feel understood and valued for their work and effort, rather than the outcome.

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