Now or Never

A pair of new parents face uncertainty from both sides of a border

Indefinite citizenship delays continue to separate a husband in Michigan from his wife and daughter in Alberta.

Citizenship delays keep a husband in Michigan from his wife and daughter in Alberta

Manit and her daughter Kirpa see Govinder through a video chat - a part of their new routine until Manit can legally move to the U.S. (Ariel Fournier)

Manit Kaur Gill is still waiting for the American green card that will allow her to move to Michigan with her husband. 

Govinder Singh Gill lives in Brownstown, Michigan, the township near Detroit where he grew up. When he and Manit met two years ago on a dating website, it didn't seem like a big deal that they would be in a long-distance relationship. Even after they married, they were confident they could navigate the immigration process. 

Then in the spring, the Canada-U.S. border shut down. And this summer, Manit gave birth to their first daughter. 

"It's definitely been hard to navigate that on my own," she says, "and reshape how I imagined motherhood would be."

"All those thoughts of setting up your home, or your baby's room, you just erase them all," she says, sitting in her parents' living room in Edmonton, Alberta. 

And now, with a 20-week-old daughter, there's still no green card. 

A global pandemic has only further stalled the couple's application and it's not clear when Manit will be able to travel to the United States again. 

In March, when countries began closing their borders, the Canadian government told citizens to come home. Manit was pregnant at the time and had to cut short her already limited time in the U.S.

Govinder couldn't be there for the ultrasound or feel his growing daughter's first kicks. They cancelled the baby shower. 

On August 5, their daughter Kirpa was born in an Edmonton hospital.

Reunited under lockdown

In June, the Canadian government loosened travel restrictions allowing immediate family members in the United States to come into Canada. Govinder was able to make it just time to see Kirpa for the first time. His travel quarantine ended two days before Manit went into labour. 

"We cut it close," Manit says, "I gave myself until thirty seven weeks before I would freak out about it." Govinder arrived for a month-long visit 37 weeks and two days into Manit's pregnancy. 

Govinder arrived just in time to end a two week quarantine and be there for his daughter's birth in Canada, only to head home to the U.S. a month later. (Arundeep Singh Sandhu)

The new family tried to see each other again shortly after, but there were more complications. 

When Kirpa was a little older than two months, Manit took a plane to Toronto and tried to catch another flight to Michigan. She says a border agent stopped her from entering the U.S. because her eligibility as a permanent resident was still under review. 

At least dad can still visit — as long as they abide by often-changing travel and quarantine restrictions. 

Govinder flew to Edmonton at the end of November and he's now anxiously waiting to see his daughter for the first time in two months... after his two-week quarantine is over. Kirpa is twice as big as she was when he last visited. 

He's looking forward to a hug the second it's allowed: "I'm going straight for the little booger."

Govinder is quarantining for two weeks at his wife's house in Edmonton, before he can see his family up close. (Ariel Fournier)

The time together will be sweet, but short. Govinder has spent the last two weeks in quarantine at Manit's family home and they'll have a week together before he leaves again. 

Once he's back in Michigan he'll have to quarantine for another two weeks to return to the rest of his family, his work and his other responsibilities at home. 

A long-term future without long-distance

Manit and Govinder say they try not to think about when their geographic separation will end. It's better to stay in the moment. 

"I just need to stay in the present so I don't miss these moments with her, as opposed to thinking maybe now, maybe now, and always looking toward the future," she says, "But I can't help but think long term."

If there's one benefit to the waiting, Govinder says, it's that once they're in the same place they'll appreciate their marriage more. 

"We've seen the bad side of things and so I don't understand why we wouldn't enjoy every moment that we spend together going forward."

"You get to know someone at the core," he says "I feel like this is really setting us up for success going forward."