Brothers return from their 'rude trip' of U.K. towns with naughty names

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It sounds like a delightful trip.

Two Scottish brothers hop in a car and set off on a 3,000 kilometre sightseeing journey around the United Kingdom.

But this was no typical tour. The sights Andy and Magnus Tait longed to see weren't Big Ben or Stonehenge. 

The Tait brothers had something else in mind: a journey to see all the rudest place names Britain has to offer — and, it turns out, there are quite a few.

Andy Tait is now back home in Aberdeen, Scotland. He spoke to As It Happens host Carol Off about his autumn expedition.

Here is part of their conversation.

Andy, what inspired this rude road trip that you took with your brother?

It was 2013 when I first had the idea. Basically, me and my brother used to work together. We were travelling for work in the north east of Scotland and we passed by a sign pointing at a town called Gash.

I don't know if that's a funny word in Canada. But it certainly is in the U.K.

We came back a couple of weeks later and we took a selfie there and it was very funny. It got me thinking — are there any other places in the U.K. we could go and take selfies at?

I kept a Word document over the years [and] every time I'd hear about a funny-named place in the paper or online or whatever I'd just add it to the list.

What are some of the other places you visited?

Wilsford Cum Lake, which I believe is an area between the areas of Wilsford and Lake. So, it's Wilsford Cum Lake, which I just thought was hilarious.

Also, there's Titty Ho. I don't know where that gets its name, but I'd like to find out. 

Also, Lickfold. That was a nice place as well, very picturesque around there.

And Pound Bottom. Again, very, very lovely area and it's quite funny.

Any scenery? Was it basically just the names and the selfie — or did you take in any of the sights?

Around the New Forest, which is in South England, that had two of our places — Sandyballs and Pound Bottom — it was really, really picturesque. It's a national park.

They have lovely, lovely countryside and even better — wild ponies. We actually had to stop on the road several times because some wild ponies had just wandered onto the road. It was quite, quite bizarre.

What are some of the other places you visited?

We started in the northwest of England with places like Cockermouth and Slackbottom Road in Bradford, Penistone in Yorkshire, Butthole Lane — things like that.

Then we sort of went down to the south west of England. We didn't go all the way into the southwest where there's a few good ones that we missed out like Crapstone.

After that we went to places like Shitterton, Cocking, South Harting — which is abbreviated as S. Harting on the sign.

And yeah, worked our way up the east coast to places like Fingringhoe, Feltwell, Rimswell, Fanny Hands Lane — places like that. Wetwang, which is another good one. The final place name we did was Coxhoe.

When you visited these places did you tell anybody what you were doing?

We didn't really have time to stop and chat to anyone. It was very much a kind of mission.

I'm now getting emails from people who live near these places. And some of them, it never even occurred to them the name was funny. I thought that was quite hilarious.

They're going, "Ha! Lived there my whole life and I didn't realize that such and such a place was funny."

How is it possible if, say, you lived on Butthole Lane, you wouldn't know that someone might find that kind of amusing?

Ha! Exactly, exactly.

You and your brother are in your thirties right?

Yeah, that's right. I'm 34. He's 32. 

So how come you didn't get this out of your system when you were in primary school?

I've always had a very childish sense of humour.

I love expending great effort to do something totally pointless ... So I think this kind of counts as being a very, very pointless exercise that took a lot of effort. I love that kind of thing.

So there's an 11-year-old buried not so deep inside you and your brother?

Very much so.

How long did this trip take you?

It took us four entire days.

It was quite a gruelling journey. There was at least sort of 16 hours a day traveling. It was nearly 2,000 miles [3,200 kilometres] as well.

I have to admit that at this show, As It Happens, there is an 11-year-old at the heart of our program as well. And so they have decided to put together the list that we think you should visit in Canada. Do you want to hear it?

Oh, I'd love to hear it.

Balls Falls, in Ontario. Crotch Lake, also in Ontario.

Great.

You'd have to make your way to Climax, Saskatchewan. 

Climax. I love it.

Shag Harbour, Nova Scotia.

Oh, amazing.

And endless places in Newfoundland, but we'll give you a couple. Spread Eagle Bay and the perennial Canadian favourite — Dildo, Newfoundland.

Dildo! Amazing, I love it.

Written by Allie Jaynes and John McGill. Produced by Allie Jaynes. Q&A has been edited for length and clarity.