As It Happens

As it Happened: The Archive Edition - The Four Weddings and a Funeral Episode

Darren Black Bear of Oklahoma faced a lot of resistance when he decided to tie the knot back in 2013. Not from friends and family, but from his state. But Mr. Black Bear found a way to marry the love of his life, Jason Pickel, all the same — with a little help from his tribe.
Darren Black Bear (R) and Jason Pickel (L) at their wedding (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

As It Happens: The Archive Edition airs each Friday of the summer at 7:30 PM — following As it Happens.


Darren Black Bear of Oklahoma faced a lot of resistance when he decided to tie the knot back in 2013. Not from friends and family, but from his state — one of the most conservative in the U.S. 

But Black Bear found a way to marry the love of his life, Jason Pickel, all the same — with a little help from his tribe. 
Jason Pickel holds his marriage license to Darren Black Bear before being married by Darren's father. (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

Here's some of his conversation with As it Happens host Carol Off.

Carol Off: Mr. Black Bear, how are you able to get married in Oklahoma? 

Darren Black Bear: With the Cheyenne and Arapaho Nations being sovereign, they follow federal federal guidelines. And so, the Defense of Marriage Act, when they found out that it was struck down, they were able to issue marriage licences to same-sex couples in the Cheyenne and Arapaho Nation.

CO: And Cheyenne-Arapaho is your tribe, is it? 

Pickel, 36, and Darren Black Bear, 45, were legally married in 2013 after receiving a marriage license through the Cheyenne Arapaho Tribe, a sovereign nation in Oklahoma. (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

DB: Yes, it is. I am Cheyenne.

CO: Jason is not Cheyenne, is he?

DB: No, he is not. He is Cherokee.

CO: So Cheyenne-Arapaho is giving you the marriage licence?

DB: Yes, they are. We've already filled out the paperwork, and we've typed up the marriage licence. And all we have to do is have our two witnesses, and my father is going to officiate the ceremony. He just has to sign it, and then we turn it back in to the tribal court. 

Darren Black Bear (L) and Jason Pickel arrive to be married (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

CO: And this is something that the Cheyenne-Arapaho have actually stated that they support — same-sex marriage?

DB: Yes. It's stated in our Bill of Rights that they cannot create tribal law that discriminates against sexual orientation. 

Darren Black Bear (R) and Jason Pickel (L) pose with their marriage licence (REUTERS/Rick Wilking)

CO: How many other tribes have the same thing? 

DB: Not very many, that I'm aware of. We've looked online to try and gather information. But there doesn't seem to be too many tribes here [in the United States] that are following federal guidelines. But also every tribe — their constitution and Bill of Rights, they're all different. 

CO: What about the state of Oklahoma? Will they recognize your marriage?

DB: No. They've already issued a statement saying it will not be recognized. We already figured that they would not recognize it, because it is illegal here in Oklahoma. 

CO: Do you know how the Cheyenne-Arapaho got to be so progressive on this issue? 
Darren Black Bear (R) reads his vows from his cellphone to Jason Pickel (L) (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

DB: I really don't know. My father — he worked for the tribes as a tribal councilman for many years, and he helped write our constitution when it was re-written over 30 years ago. And he knew that it did not state that marriage was between a man and a woman. He knew that they left it open. And so it was actually his idea for us to go and apply for a marriage licence to the tribes a few years ago. 

CO:  He sounds like a very open-minded man.

DB: Yes my father's always fought for equality and he's always fought for civil rights. And he did march with Martin Luther King, Jr. 

I just want to be able to enjoy getting married by my father to the man I love.- Darren Black Bear

CO: I understand though you had to change the venue of the wedding. Was that a security issue?

DB: Part of it was due to security. We were just kind of concerned — since we've been so public with the location — that possibly the Westboro Baptist Church might show up to picket or protest. I hope to have that be the last thing on my mind, because I just want to be able to enjoy getting married by my father to the man I love. 
Darren Black Bear (l), 45, and Jason Pickel (r), 36, were married by Darren's father, Rev. Floyd Black Bear in El Reno, OK, Oct. 31, 2013 (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

You can hear more of Carol Off's October 29, 2013 interview with Darren Black Bear — as well as the following stories, on this week's 'Four Weddings and a Funeral' episode of "As It Happened: The Archive Edition":