Young Calgarians lend listening ear to teens in distress

This is Part 5 of a five-part series looking at the state of youth mental health in Calgary.

Calgary teenagers share their daily struggles and darkest thoughts with the young volunteers at the Distress Centre's teen hotline, ConnecTeen. In return, those volunteers offer an empathetic ear and hope for the future.

• WATCH | How teens are helping teens at the Distress Centre in the video above

"You really just have to meet that person where they are and really support them through whatever it is they're going through," said volunteer Fiza Rajput.

The free confidential service is available 24 hours a day. About 40 volunteers, ranging in age from 15 to 22, respond during the afternoon and evening hours. Adult volunteers from the Distress Centre cover the rest of the day. 

Text, call or chat

Not surprisingly, most teens contact the hotline by text or online chat. They're much less likely to pick up the phone and call. If they do call, a translation service is available in more than 200 languages; however, that service is not available for texts or chats.

• Want to learn more about this project? On Tuesday, Jan. 11, CBC Calgary reporter Lucie Edwardson will answer your questions live about her five-part series Kids in Crisis. You can submit any questions you have here or comment below.

Andrea Leon, 21, signed up with ConnecTeen after she heard a presentation in school. She started volunteering at 16, hoping to learn how to help her friends.

"I used to have a lot of friends always come to me for advice," she said. "I never felt like I could really give them that much advice because I wasn't really aware of how to handle it".

Rajput, now 20, started volunteering with ConnecTeen when she was 17. One of her friends was already involved and she was impressed.

"I was like, 'wow, that seems really good, and that seems kind of cool.'Like you're able to really help people in life-and-death situations."

'No one cares, but I feel like you do'

The conversations do often begin in dark places. Teens will talk about anxiety, depression and suicide. Rajput and Leon both welcome a chance to make a difference in those moments.

"Sometimes they'll say, 'no one cares, but I feel like you do,'" said Leon, which she said is very fulfilling.

"I have been on so many chats where at the very end of the chat … they'll be like, 'hey, you know what? Thank you so much. You genuinely saved my life' or 'really kept me safe during this conversation,'" said Rajput. "I honestly feel those instances … you feel like, 'wow, I made a difference in this person's life.'"

If volunteers determine someone is at risk of suicide, they work with that person to come up with a plan to stay safe.

The volunteers don't work alone. A staff member from the Distress Centre oversees each shift. That supervisor can see and hear all of their conversations in real time and intervene and get help if needed. 

Volunteers mentored

Ashley De Vera Macayan, program co-ordinator for ConnecTeen, began as a teenage volunteer. She acknowledges it can be hard as a volunteer not to worry about the teens who get in touch.

De Vera Macayan said staff debrief volunteers after tough shifts or conversations.

"So they don't have to take it home with them," she said.

The young volunteers are also each assigned a mentor to talk with about their feelings.

Still, she remembers times as a volunteer when she went home and cried, "which happens," she said, "and it's OK."

It did not stop her from volunteering and ultimately working for the program.

"From my experience as a volunteer and also from the conversations I've had with volunteers, it's about the impact you make … you were still able to make a connection with someone and let them know they were important and cared for anyway," said De Vera Macayan.

'Teens can help teens'

Rajput and Leon believe no one is better prepared to talk with young people in distress than other young people. 

"There's genuinely no other population that's going to relate to teens more than teens, hence the name, I guess, ConnecTeen, because you know teens can help teens," said Rajput.

The hotline is not only for teens. Adults can get in contact, too, if they want to talk with someone about the teens in their life.

Potential ConnecTeen volunteers must apply, and then make it through an interview and a group role-playing session. If they're accepted, they receive more than 60 hours of training. That includes time sitting with a coach who helps them respond to chats, texts and calls until they're ready to do it themselves. 

During the pandemic ConnecTeen volunteers have worked remotely. They stay in constant communication with a Distress Centre supervisor throughout their shifts, and those supervisors are still able to monitor all of the chats and calls.

From January to October 2021, ConnecTeen volunteers had almost 2,800 conversations, which is down from pre-pandemic levels.

The Distress Centre says that's likely because they weren't able to do in-person presentations at schools to advertise the service. For now, they're doing virtual sessions to try to get the word out to students.

If you or someone you love is struggling, AHS recommends the following resources:

• Call the Distress Centre at 403-266-HELP (4357)
• Call ConnecTeen at 403-264-TEEN or text 587-333-2724
• Call the Kids Help Phone at 1-800-668-6868 or text CONNECT to 686868.
• Bullying Helpline at 1-888-456-2323
• Call the Mental Health Helpline at 1-877-303-2642 or the addiction line at 1-866-332-2322.
• Visit the Help in Tough Times website for more resources.
• If in crisis call 911 or visit the closest emergency department.