STUDY: Every known photo of Steve Bannon was taken accidentally with front-facing iPhone camera
WASHINGTON, DC—While the clandestine dealings of President Donald Trump's chief advisor Steve Bannon remain the subject of extensive debate, one mystery has at last been cleared up: a new study out today has found that every existing photo on earth of Bannon – who is often mocked for his ghoulish and unkempt appearance – was taken by accident by the front-facing camera of an iPhone, in poor lighting and at a low angle.
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"You know how you look when you turn on the camera on your iPhone, and it's facing you, and you suddenly see yourself and you're like 'bluh!' and then you try to switch quickly to the back camera but sometimes you accidentally take a picture?" explained digital analyst Paul Kovac, who worked on the study.
"Well, it would seem in Mr. Bannon's case, not only was a picture taken every time, but every picture of Mr. Bannon – ever – was taken in this manner."
While the results may seem unbelievable, extensive digital forensics have confirmed that even photographs of Bannon taken from far away were the result of accidental front-camera usage, from someone trying to take a picture of themselves or something behind them with the back camera.
"It does explain how so few people in the political sphere saw Bannon coming," added Kovac.
"Nobody knew what he actually looked like from straight on, and through human eyes. Or even through the iPhone's other, better, camera."
The authors of the study hope that these findings, which but for the grace of God could happen to any of us, will shift the conversation around Bannon away from his appearance and onto his objectively very terrible politics.
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