Man injures self after mistaking handgun for bottle of men's body wash

WINNIPEG, MB—In the latest mishap stemming from the aggressively macho packaging of men's shower products, a Winnipeg man has accidentally shot himself, believing he was holding a bottle of Extreme Men Care Artic Surge body wash instead of a 9mm handgun.

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Sources say that Carver returned from Shoppers Drug Mart at 5:45 pm yesterday afternoon and proceeded to unload a bag full of men's shower products next to his improperly stored handgun. Mistaking the gunmetal finish and tactical grip of the firearm with the gunmetal finish and tactical grips of the assorted bottles of male-oriented shampoo and body wash, he placed it alongside the other products in his shower.

At 7:45 pm, Carver took a shower in preparation for a date, at which point he mistakenly picked the handgun up from the shelf in his shower and fired it into his body scrubber, intending to apply body wash to it but instead shooting himself straight through the hand.

"I have to be honest, I feel pretty dumb," said Carver, currently recovering at Seven Oaks General Hospital. "But in my defense, as a man, pretty much everything in my shower looks like a gun or part of a motorcycle."

Carver says he only recently switched to Extreme Men Care Artic Surge, and had previously been using Menzone Body G.E.A.R. Spartan Rush, a bar soap which he claims he also nearly mistook for a gun on several occasions, and only identified as soap because of the word "MAN" imprinted on every bar in a military stencil font.

"While we understand that mistakes are going to be made, we feel that maintaining the overall gun aesthetic is just too integral to our brand," said a representative from Unilever, the producers of Extreme Men Care Artic Surge.

"Just as the packaging of our women's shower products encourage women to feel pride in their body type, our men's products really strive to inspire the feeling of holding a huge gun or the controls of a fighter jet. And that's an important message.

Carver is facing a long physical recovery, but says he's more concerned about the psychological trauma he experiences whenever he looks at his hand, which – thanks to a generous application of Ulti-Men WolfTank Bleed-Force bandages – currently also looks a lot like a gun.

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