In new film 'Logan', Canadian citizen Wolverine will use only his healthcare plan to heal
COLD LAKE, AB—In exciting news for Canuck fans of Marvel comics and the X-Men, sources say that in the upcoming third and final standalone Wolverine film Logan, the hero will forgo employing the mutant healing factor he usually employs to instantly recover from any and all injuries, and use only the universal healthcare that he enjoys as a Canadian citizen to fix them.
"I couldn't be more excited to work this into the story," says Hugh Jackman, who has now played the hero in nine different films including Logan, which opens this Friday.
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"This takes a look at something we've always known about the character, but never adequately explored in the films. What use does Wolverine make of his Canadian origins?"
"And if Magneto, Sabretooth, and Wendigo work together to temporarily rob the erstwhile James Howlett of his powers, is he able to find his health card and get stitched up at the walk-in? Especially because he has one of those old red and white health cards. Will they even accept that?"
"You'll have to watch the film to find out," smiled Jackman.
According to writer/director James Mangold, the movie aims to be a gritty action film with a dramatic heart, and will mostly steer clear of any one political statement.
"I will say, however," he continued, "that I don't know what he would have done in our film if he didn't have that option."
"Sure, he maybe had to spend a little bit more time in the waiting room, but it enabled him to get the repairs he needed to get back out there and do his job."
At press time, there were rumours of a deleted scene wherein Cyclops tries to explain to Canadian Wolverine and British Charles Xavier why it's actually good that he can't get the eye surgery he so desperately needs unless he somehow comes into $250,000.
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