Visiting parents make for painful Game of Thrones watch

TORONTO, ON—They say hindsight is 20/20. This has certainly proven to be the case for 32-year-old financial planner Cheryl Park, who made the ill-advised decision to watch back-to-back episodes of HBO's Game of Thrones on Sunday night with her visiting parents David and Maureen.

"I don't know what I was thinking," says Park. "They'd never even seen the show before."

Indeed, the senior Parks, both of whom admit they usually prefer lighter fare like Castle or "the one with the guy who says 'Bazooka!'," [ed. note: Big Bang Theory?] were left confused by the Emmy-winning series' myriad plot lines, shifting locations, complex mythology, and unusual names.

"Every ten seconds it was, 'Who's that?' 'Where is this?' 'Why is that man in a tree?'" Park explains. "Honestly, it was exhausting."

Park, a financial advisor for TD Canada, claims her decision was motivated by a desire to catch up on the show and pass a little time. "I missed last week's episode, so I had to keep leaving the room when my co-workers wanted to talk about it," she explains. "Plus after four straight days with my folks I'd more or less run out of things to say. Figured I'd kill two birds with one stone. I was an idiot."

Sadly, the only thing killed was Park's ability to relax, as the show's fragmented storytelling, grim violence, and graphic sexuality combined to make her evening "a living hell."  

Sources confirm that whenever something dark or violent happened, Maureen would gasp before casting a disapproving look in her daughter's direction. Less judgmental, but somehow far worse, were the low guttural noises David emitted during the show's frequent scenes depicting nudity.

"I've never heard that sound emerge from my father," whispers an emotional Park.

At press time Maureen was emotionally unavailable for comment, having grown distant and thin-lipped since the viewing debacle. Reached via telephone, David admitted that while Game of Thrones was not his "cup of tea" there were elements he enjoyed. "Like that albino girl in... Egypt was it? I like her a lot."