The best Christmas movie is Die Hard 3
Ask just about any guy what his favourite Christmas movie is and he'll give you the same answer: White Christmas? Fat chance. Love Actually? He doesn't love it, actually. It's a Wonderful Life? It's an incorrect answer.
No, every red-blooded dude will tell you that the greatest Christmas movie of all time is something a little more, shall we say... unconventional: The 1988 Bruce Willis action epic Die Hard.
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And every red-blooded dude is wrong. Because the Die Hard franchise never got closer to perfection (at least in terms of Christmas-related content and themes) than it did in one of the film's sequels, and I think you know the one I mean: when John McClane teamed up with Samuel L Jackson to fight terrorists during a scorching midsummer heatwave in Die Hard 3: Die Hard with a Vengeance.
The Christmas stuff is just much subtler, that's all.
When John McClane is first forced to team up with Harlem storeowner Zeus Carver (Jackson), he mishears his name as "Jesús". While Zeus goes on to deny that his name is in fact Jesús (much like the very humble Jesus would likely do today), by then it's pretty clear just who McClane – himself very much a "Santa Claus" to the various hostages he's saved throughout his life – has teamed up with for this Christmas caper.
The first two Die Hard films may have taken place on Christmas Eve, but The Reason for the Season himself waited until this late-July scorcher to join in. Advantage: This movie.
Also, are you sure it isn't Christmas in this movie? When John catches a child stealing, the child explains, "It's Christmas, you could steal city hall." This leads John to figure out Simon Gruber's master plan, and he and Zeus then steal the kid's bike, as Zeus tells him "It's Christmas."
My point is that within the space of eight seconds two people plainly say "it's Christmas" which doesn't even happen in the Bible, so I'll just leave that there.
I could go on and point out some of the more obvious themes – that while Gruber steals gold, McClane and Carver have to solve puzzles that require them to be frank and sensible or they'll be murdered – but those are probably already so clear that I don't think I should have to.
Deny this controversial take if you like, but there's no denying it: Die Hard 3 is a better Christmas film than Die Hard 1 OR 2, and also Die Hard 4: Live Free or Die Hard, which had even more Christmas stuff but wasn't good.
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