5 weird objects Stephen Harper left at 24 Sussex Drive

Now that he’s moved out of the Prime Minister’s residence, there are some items Stephen Harper might have wanted to consider throwing out to avoid embarrassment.

James Hartnett · CBC Comedy · Posted: Nov 11, 2015 12:00 AM EST | Last Updated: November 11, 2015

1. Cans of oil

Now that he's moved out of the Prime Minister's residence, there are some items Stephen Harper might have wanted to consider throwing out to avoid embarrassment. For example – the numerous cans of oil Harper kept around the house. With oil being necessary to lubricate mechanical moving parts of any robot or android, it's long been assumed that Harper has relied on a squirt of oil now and again to stop himself from malfunctioning or overheating.

2. Mysterious painting of Harper as an increasingly aging man

Another item our former PM left behind at 24 Sussex Drive is that mysterious, ever changing painting of himself. During Harper's tenure as PM, this portrait has rapidly aged, becoming quite gruesome (getting particularly ugly during the recent niqab scandal). No idea what forces are at play there, but maybe he should have tossed that one in the trash.

3. A year's worth of Christmas presents from the population of Whoville

We all remember Harper's controversial 'Steal Christmas' legislation from a few years ago. His decision to steal all the Christmas presents from the small town of Whoville one Christmas Eve did make sense from a policy standpoint, but was ultimately unsuccessful as the townsfolk celebrated Christmas anyway, singing songs together hand in hand. Harper never actually returned any of the gifts to the Whoville population, so he may want to find a way to dump them to avoid embarrassment.

4. Prodigy CD

While Harper is a known fan of Sweet Caroline, he enjoys many other genres of music as well. One album featured prominently in Harper's CD case is Prodigy's crossover album The Fat of the Land (featuring the terrifying '90s classic Firestarter). While many of us suspected Harper might be a secret industrial, goth techno fan at heart, its discovery might make some of his more old fashioned constituents uncomfortable.

5. Tar sand mementos

Harper's role in exacerbating the environmental damage caused to the Alberta Tar sands is certainly a sensitive issue in Canada. As such, it might've been wise for Harper to have ditched any mementos or knick-knacks he picked up on his visits there: T-shirts that read 'I went to the Alberta Tar Sands and all I got was this lousy T-shirt'; mugs that say 'I (image of an oil splotch) Alberta; and stuffed oil derricks all fit in this category.